I am an older sister to four younger siblings and while visiting home from college some things were brought to my attention. My 15 year old sister is clearly having problems, not only in school but at home. In the past two weeks I have witnessed several outbursts directed towards her mother (my stepmother) which included yelling, cursing, and overall disrespect. I also learned that she failed three courses last year and has to repeat these courses which means not graduating highschool with her class. In addition to these issues, she has experimented with the "cutting" trend, meeting people online in chat rooms and on facebook, and her personal hygeine habbits are severely lacking.
I know it sounds as if I am "bashing" her, but I am truely concerned for her health, safety, and future. I only want the best for her and I feel like I am the only one. Her mom tries to take care of the issues, but she is easily fooled. My sister can convince her that things will change or that whatever issue brought up isn't as serious as it seems.. What really bothers me about this is that my step mom keeps my dad in the dark. The only ONE of these issues that he is aware of is the disrespect towards her mom.
I feel so torn. I know that if my dad knew about these things that he would do whatever it takes to help her. He may overreact at first, but once he calms down, I know he would only do what is in her best interrest. I want to tell him and get my sister the help that she needs, but I also do not want to be the one to cause problems between our parents. I feel that if I tell him, my stepmom will be very mad at me and our relationship will never be the same. I also feel that if I don't and he somehow finds out from someone else and knows that I knew and didn't tell him, our relationship will suffer. This is really a tought decision and any advise would be greatly appreciated.....
I think you should definitely tell your dad. He needs to know what all is going on with his family and not be kept in the dark. Your sister needs lots of help and support. Your dad may be just what your sister needs to help her turn her life around. Your step mom will probably be upset with you for a little while, but I am sure she will eventually get over it and be thankful that the burden of taking care of your sister isn't entirely on her shoulders anymore.
You really should tell your dad. There may be some bitterness between your step mom and sister but she needs help and currently is not getting it. You want whats best for her and she needs help. Your sister will thank you in the end eventually.
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