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My best friends children...
lissmeanstrouble posted:
So... I am 24 and I dont have any children of my own, but I recently got married to a man who has 2 children and so now I have two step-kids. I have a few best friends, that are like sisters to me, cause growing up I never had a real sister of my own, just a big brother. Dont get me wrong my brother is awesome, thats not the point of this though.

My Friend is 32 and has a 13 yo daughter, a 8 yo step-daughter, an 8 yo son, and a 2, a 1, and an 8 month old baby boys. I have known her for a bout 6 years and she was an awesome mom when she only had two. Her son and daughter listened and never used poor language. Now with her 3 boys she had one after another she reminds me of the little old lady who lived in a shoe had too many kids didnt know what to do.... I go to her house and it wreaks of dirty diapers, there have been a few times I asked her to immediately go outside to have a cigarette cause her house made me gagg and I didnt know how to tell her with out hurting her feelings.
I feel like Im over stepping a boundary by saying anything to her, but she is always venting about her kids to me, and I care about her, and her kids, and dont like to see them having a hard time.

Her daughter lost her virginity about a month ago and already broke up with that boy and has another boyfriend. My friend was soooo upset, but then, she lets her daughter have a sleepover with her new boyfriend?! When I was 13 having a sleepover with my GIRL friends was questionable!!! She is on birth control but... I just... cant imagine her having sex she is too little... and her 8 yo son is really interested in sex and drinking and smoking and I was wondering where that was coming from, and I think its partly his older sister and mainly the television they allow him to watch. I was absolutely astounded I went to her house for dinner and her son announces she let him watch Hostel. Hostel is an extremely inapproprriate movie for a boy his age to watch!

I am so bothered by her childrens behavior because one I care about them, and two I have my own step kids now, and she keeps telling me her son and step daughter really want to be friends and play together but my step-children are so innocent compaired to her kids, I dont want them tainting them! my stepson is 12 and my step daughter is 9, they are such good kids, and they are not eager to grow up too fast.

Is it way out of bounds to even feel so strongly about her parenting? Should I say something to her? Can I help her? Has anyone been in a similar situation?

We were drinking one night and her son woke up and came upstairs and begged her for a shot of tequila and she gave it to him in hopes it would turn him off, then he pretended he was drunk, and I was not even comfortable drinking with the kids there... I dunno what to do except maybe space myself from her, though I would rather not lose an old friend...

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