Parenting: Friends Talking Community

Be prepared to be dazzled. This is bound to have alot of twists and turns. The reason i'm putting this here, is because i don't know what else to do. First of all, my name is Scott. I am 38 years old. I am not legally married, but I have a "wife" by the name of Lynn. she is 60. Don't ask. More about lynn in a bit. 20 years ago (when i was 18) I was going with a girl by the name of Connie. she's 40 now. She became pregnant by me. I suggested she get an abortion or giving her up for adoption.. She then told me she would put her up for adoption. Stupid thing, i know. But she canged her mind and she told me to get out and never come back.. I did. She had a baby girl (Tammy). I demanded a DNA test. She was my child. I held her a total of 4 times when she was a baby and I never knew her growing up. During that time Connie & i started dating again. I don't remember why we broke up again, but things soured. 11 years later she pressed for child support.I built up in my mind, by this time, that she had brainwashed Tammy against me and that Connie was not a nice person. We saw each other at the support hearing. I got to talk to my daughter for the first time. We spent about an hour talking about stuff in general. By this time my wife Lynn had been in the picture for about 2 years.We are not legally married, but have been together 16 years. We may as well be married. I had heard Connie & Tammy had moved to New York... last year, I had some fidelity problems. My wife's trust of me had gone right out the window. We were working on putting things back together. Cue a month ago. I looked up my daughter on Facebook and got back in touch with her and her mom. After a tense couple of days, I was accepted as her father. She now calls me daddy, and we hug and all the things daddys are supposed to do for their daughter. Did i mention that Connie still is in love with me, and regrets what happened 20 years ago? More on this in a bit. Now here's where it gets interesting... I'm not interested in Connie. My wife thinks i'm sleeping with her. (For the record, i'm not..) My daughter wants to see me all the time and my wife tells me I can only see her one day a week and talk to her on IM whenever I want but until 10PM and then she gets me. I want to be there for my daughter, but be there for lynn. Connie AND Tammy both have emotional issues. Connie was physically abused by 3 different guys and one of them was her ex-husband of 7 years. my daughter was raped at 6 by a 12 year old, and was beaten by the same ex-husband. That, tacked on that i wasn't there for her (abandonment issues)... Yea... So what do i do to create a happy medium? Thanks for reading, and I look forward to the responses.