Parenting: Friends Talking Community

A friend of mine grew up with a stepfather from the time she was about 7. Around age 12 or 14 he began to act inappropriately and sneaky. Most of it was peeping either through a hole around her ceiling fan or a crack in the bathroom floor. She also noticed when she was older (16-18) that her bedroom door hinges were sprayed with WD40 and that he was obviously entering her room at night. One night when she was about 18-19 she woke up on the couch to find him right next to her bottom. She didn't necessarily feel anything because she was a heavy sleeper, but he jerked and quickly started putting on his shoes. It was a huge sectional couch and no reason for him to be so close. Another time something similar happened but later that morning she discovered a cut (with scissors...it was a straight cut, not a rip) that went through her long johns AND underwear.

After that she confronted her mother. She essentially was called a liar and a trouble maker by her stepfather and her mother believed him. She is now in her later 30s and her mother acts as tho she believes her, but doesn't know what to think, do or say. It was all so weird with no real proof or an instance of clear cut touching. The daughter has forgiven and moved on. The parents have a decent relationship and she never wanted to ruin that or hurt her mom. They have been married nearly 30 years now.

She now has a daughter of her own who is about 6 years old. She allows her daughter to spend the night there once in a great while and though it causes her distress, she feels nothing would ever happen...but a part of her is very torn. The grandparents, especially the grandmother is very close with the granddaughter and they live an hour away. Her mother and husband tell her they genuinely do not think there is anything to worry about and the mother tells her she never lets the granddaughter out of her sight.

Does anyone have any thoughts on this situation?