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Parents of Tweens and Teens - Welcome to your home!

Bundles of hormones, emotions, and insecurities. Rebellion, dating, school problems, peer and societal pressures, its our job to see these kids to adulthood. Get the support you need here!

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need to vent about my 18 y/o
sadmomof1 posted:
Hi my name is Lisa, I am not sure just where to start but things have gotten way out of hand! I had been hearing that he was smoking pot and doing other drugs as well. I had never seen anything in my home but however after hearing this more then I wanted, I started searching through his rm. and had come across a bong! Well, I confronted him and he denied that it was his so I explained to him if it's not your then you don't mind if I smash it! I had taken a hammer to it infront of him and didn't seem to bother him at all. Needless to say I had come across some other items as well that I wasn't very fond of finding but the thing that bothers me the most is the fact that I had checked my banking online and found a huge difference and called to see what was going on and was told to call the company itself. The sad part of this is after calling the company and finding out what it was I explained that they needed to reimburse that money because neither my husband or myself had ordered anything. I was told that I'd have to go after the person whom did this and I asked well how do I find out who did this and they asked me if I knew a telephone number which they gave and I said yes that is my son. Well, this happened prior to me paying my mortgage so this put me out almost $200 which I didn't tell my husband but had called sons dad and explained what had happened and he helped me by giving me the money so I could take care of this. My son is bipolar and has been off his meds since turning 18, which the highs and lows are not the best by any means! He had become verbally abusive towards everyone in the house along with being destructive. The sad part was I had covered up some of the destructiveness by saying I had done it accidently and so on. I couldn't deal with it anymore and had called the cops to have him removed from the home and was told that they couldn't do anything til he had stolen or whatever but I ended up explaining the issues and I had to file an order of protection against him!! Now I am feeling like I failed him as a parent!!! I love him very much but having smaller kids in the home I need to protect them as well so I am torn!! Have I done the right thing or what??????? I keep asking myself these questions.
Thanks for letting me vent!!
BLU_HART40 responded:
Yes, you did the right thing and that police officer doesnt sound correct. He is 18 and unless he is paying any bills you have the right to permanently excuse him from the household if you feel he is a threat to your family and he has stolen from you $200. Get him out of your house and practice tough love.

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