We allowed a friend of our daughters to stay with us, her mother asked if she could cause things are really bad at home. So we said she could stay. After 3 weeks of her being her I found out she is really my daughters romantic interest. I am so furious that my daughter disrespected our household rules to the extent of having her girlfriend sleeping in bed with her. With her 11 year old sisters room on one side our room on the other. I do not care boy or girl we have never allowed her to have boys in her room or spend the night. She confirm she knew she was wrong and we would be very mad when we found out this was her "girlfriend". After I found out I told the girl no more in my daughters room. (we have a guestroom). The next morning I walk in my daughters room and what do I see this girl laying in bed with my daughter. I feel so deliberately disrespected. I told the girl she could no longer stay here and have restricted them from communicating or seeing each other till we return from a 2 week trip. I am concerned that this relationship is unhealthy due circumstances behind it. I want to cut it off all together cause they both lied and disrespected my home. How do I handle this? what does this say to my 11 year old? its ok to lie and sneak disrespect the house rules with no consequences.
So far it sounds like you did the right thing. True your daughter can't become pregnant, but she should not expose her exploits to her much younger sister.
Love your daughters, but talk to your daughters. Separately and together. You'll need to accept your daughters sexual preferance, but she has to respect your boundries.
Yes, your daughter and her friend has deliberately disrepected you. I would talk to the girl's parents and let them know what happened and how you feel. You need to let the girls and the parents know that the girls just spat in your face and it won't be tolerated. Just because your daughter has a female partner it's no different that if she had a male partner. Sex is Sex, whether heterosexual or homosexual and an 11 year old should be involved. PERIOD.
I would also have her checked for STD's. Just to be on the safe side.
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