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I need help, I found my 11 year old daughter sexting with a boy from school
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An_221697 posted:
[TRIGGER] I took her phone away and I talked to her about consequences, I need some advise on how to take care of the situation, should I be harder on her? I just felt like crying cause the content was so disgusting. I didn't even think about having sex until I was like 18! please advise. I won't giver her phone back, should I tell the boy's parents?
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Lainey_WebMD_Staff responded:
[TRIGGER] I know you are very upset and concerned!

You did the right thing, your daughter might be too young for a phone. Keep a close eye on her computer use too. And iTouches can text too. It is your call about telling the boy's parents. Keep us updated!
 
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An_221698 replied to Lainey_WebMD_Staff's response:
Well she had a phone just in case of emergencies but what a mistake I made by providing one for her. I really need to go get her a line just to call me and her step dad. Our computer has parental controls and its close to our dinning room so I can see what she is doing. I still don't know if I should tell his parents. I told my daughter she needed to talk to him at school and let him know that was a mistake, they should have not been talking about grown up stuff. She needs to take responsibilities for her actions.

Anyways thanks for your response and I will keep u updated.
 
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Lainey_WebMD_Staff replied to An_221698's response:
Hi Meyomua,

A young child that is looking at pornographic material can have something going on much deeper. WebMD has a crisis resource information site

Take care,

Lainey
 
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Boyzmomee replied to Lainey_WebMD_Staff's response:
As the mother of a boy, I would want to know.
 
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meyomua replied to Boyzmomee's response:
Thanks, I think its fear for the boy's parents to know. wow how difficult.
 
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meyomua replied to Lainey_WebMD_Staff's response:
She has been so good since I took her phone away! Providing her with a phone was a big mistake, hey but at least I found out what she was doing right? Anyways I think she is feeling guilty and she has been really good and responsible lately.
She has been cleaning her room and bathroom without me telling her twice and she is doing a lot better in school. She has always been an A student and I had noticed since I gave her a phone she was slacking a little bit. Anyways, hopefully it won't happen again. I am praying that she will be able to tell me whats going on in her little mind from now on..

She is really excited about getting into the spelling bee contest, we are going to try to concentrate on that and I will pay more close attention to her.

Thanks for all your help and impute.
 
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An_221699 replied to Lainey_WebMD_Staff's response:
She has been so good since I took her phone away! Providing her with a phone was a big mistake, hey but at least I found out what she was doing right? Anyways I think she is feeling guilty and she has been really good and responsible lately.
She has been cleaning her room and bathroom without me telling her twice and she is doing a lot better in school. She has always been an A student and I had noticed since I gave her a phone she was slacking a little bit. Anyways, hopefully it won't happen again. I am praying that she will be able to tell me whats going on in her little min from now on.

She is really excited about getting into the spelling bee contest, we are going to try to concentrate on that and I will pay more close attention to her.

Thanks for all your help and impute.
 
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Lainey_WebMD_Staff replied to An_221699's response:
I understand you might have some fear but it is important that the parents and SS, or a teacher know this boy has access to the material. I am glad your daughter is doing well but the little boy also needs help.

Take care,

Lainey
 
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Boyzmomee replied to meyomua's response:
Yes, and they may get angry with you. However, I still say I would want to know. My sons are 13 and 20.

I'm sorry you are going through this.

I am a social worker. I have a co-worker who found condoms in her 13 year olds possession. She thought it was about sex but it wasn't. He and his friends thought it would be "funny" to throw them at a girl at school. She was horrified!

These kinds of situations can happen to all of us. Kids don't think or always understand the ramifications of their actions.
 
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Boyzmomee replied to Lainey_WebMD_Staff's response:
Yes, another reason to tell the boy's parents.
 
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sdcs15 responded:
Sexting can be tough to track. Only one in seven sexters has been caught having sent or received these types of messages, most commonly by a parent. If you are worried about your child, there's a mobile app called AmberWatch SafeText that allows parents to monitor their child's mobile device for instances of sexting in a safe, trusted manner. You can easily find it online at the AmberWatch SafeText website.
 
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rludwig82 replied to An_221698's response:
I just caught my 13 year old daught doing the same thing withmy freind son's. We went thru my freinds son's phone since my daughter thought she was samrt deletling all her messages out of her phone. I never fell so angry in my life!! I told her about all this already. I had my daugther when I was 16 years old. I feel liek my daguhter thinks it ok because I had her so young!!! I know why see doing it becuse I did the same thing when I was her age I wanted to be loved and have the affection in my life. Both my parents died at a young age so I was taking care of my 2 young brothers and my own daughter, I got my own apartment then I was 16 finished high school went to college. Kids now a days are spoiled and we as parents don't teache them how to a survie on there own. I thought i was doing a good job talking to her about sex and what comes along with it. My daughter is overweight by 40 pounds so I know think she getting attention finally but I told her is the wrong attention ahe seeking. I am hopeing that now she start a cheerleading and I have her doing weightmangment that thinks will change. I am at a lost for words right now!! About a month ago i caught her frenching kissing the neightbors son in my back yard with my 8 year daughter watching them. My daughter doing all this in front of my 8 year daughter!!! WTF!!!!!!!!! I don't know what to do!!!!!! I do have my daughter going to a OBGYN doctor so they can talk to her about sex and all the diesaeses, the doctors affice said they will straighter her right up when she gets done with them. I would talk to your OBGYN also about if they offer any advice for your daughter. We as women hate the OBGYN so image what your daughter would think. If you learning any news or have advice for please let me know!! Your not the only face this problem, its amoung all our teens right now!! There needs to be something done about our kids with the internet and cell; phone!!! Not sure what but this becomeing a huge problem with all kids!!! I will pray for you and your family. I do pray for everyone in the world for world peace and happiness and healthy families.

Thank you,
rludwig
 
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jd1000 responded:
just seen on news other day how many kids and teens are doing this and it is so sad. we just need to keep teaching kids that it is not ok to sexting or sending photos to friends etc. it is just not good. it is like whatever happen to the days where ya were only nude for baths and maybe sleeping. it is like as a kid i would never of sent nude pics to friends. of course tv and magazines dont help as they seem to incurage all of it.
 
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meyomua replied to jd1000's response:
I created this post more than a year ago and things have changed a lot. My daughter is doing so much better now. Thank God I was able to find out what was going on and after a lot of talking to her and showing her that we care, she has changed. She is 13 now and we have different issues, such as mood swings and other but nothing too serious. I appreciate all of your responses.

We were able to restrict her phone usage and texting, as well as computer time. She does great at school and she is not boy crazy anymore

Kids are a blessing and we as parents just need to be patient and keep trying.


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