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An_221758 posted:
I have a daughter that is 10 1/2 and she is constantly saying that she hates her life and her younger brother. We have been through alot in the last four years: My dad passed away (she was very close to him) and her father and I got a divorce too. There are still issues with their dad. The woman that he lives with is very vicious and will do anything that she can to push my buttons. That woman is not very nice to my daughter or my son.
I have taken her to speak with a counselor and she did say that my daughter was depressed. We went for a little while, then when I got married, we stopped going.
I have caught her in lies and she will push my son for no reason, then try to justify the reason that she did it. My husband is really good with her, but we are both seeing things that have to change and we are not real sure what to do next. I honestly think that if there was a camp where she could help and learn responsibility for herself close by, that would be where I would be sending. I hope that I do not sound too harsh. I love her with all that I am, I am asking for some suggestions.
Thank you so much.
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0 responded:
 
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momuv4girls responded:
It does sound like your daughter has been through a lot in the last few years. Some children have better coping mechanisms than others, your daughter is sending out an "alarm" and her behavior needs to be addressed.

I would suggest finding a highly qualified, smart Child Psychologist (preferably female) to see your daughter on a regular basis (at least twice a month).

Your daughter is at the early stages of puberty and life will get a lot more rocky if she doesn't get some coping skills, social skills, life skills under her belt.

It would be great for your daughter to have someone to talk with outside the home who she can build a relationship with and trust - that is why I recommend seeing the Psychologist at least twice a month.

As for the lady her Father lives with........any chance she can see her Dad without her around? That is very destructive to children.

(((Hugs)))
-Kathleen
 
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Jaimarie_109 responded:
I understand where your coming from, because I was dedpressed at a young age myself, and my story is very similar to yours. My mom and father had split up when I was very young, they have always had their own place since I could remember, but i was use to being aaround him, and when he stopped coming around I went into my depression mode. I was doing the same exact things your daughter was doing, like fighting my sister all the time, trying to get attention, lieing all the time...etc. My mother had enough just like you, so whe took me to some specialist and I was on meds for my depression. It reallt didnt help, the meds made me sick, and I kept a stomache ache. But as I grew older, I seemed to have come over myself, and then the point where mmy father started to come around. Everything was okay, Im not saying our daughter may want more attention from you, or maybe she just want her father back in her life, you have to make it clear to her that its not going to be like that anymore, and let her know that you love her, and no one can come in between you and her, and see how that goes. I hope that I could help....but ai had to comment on this post, cause it brought back alot of my childhood memories...
***Jai'Marie***
 
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An_221759 responded:
I think that you should sit her down and have a long talk with her. It should just be you and her, and you should just let her speak. You should just let her tell you how she feels whether it be selfish, bias, right or wrong. Sometimes we just need someone to listen. After that just take baby steps. Have patients as we all need as parents and I think a summber camp will be good as well. I also think that a meeting with her new stepmother should be in line as well. Mistreatment of your children is unacceptable period. You should have a talk with her as well.


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