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Teen Boys' Health
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16 Yr old Immature Behavior
Sroachca posted:
We have a 16 1/2 yr old teenage boy. When he wants to avoid confrontation he hides either under a bed or under a desk at school. He is not afraid of us just the confrontation. We do not believe in any form of physical spaking etc. He doesn't seem to understand the difference between his choices and consequences. He choses not to do ANYTHING in any of classes. He just shows up but doesn't care if he fails. We try taking privelages away and he just adjusts to whatever we take away. We have tried reverse and given him inscintaves to encourage him to do better and that doesn't work either. I am most concered with his immature behavior - his lies about everything and hides homework and food in the strangest places.He doesn't have many friends and has been diagnosed with ADHD but refuses to take any medication. Please help!!
momuv4girls responded:
In my opinion, a child of this age who has difficulties such as you describe, needs a Psychological Evaluation by a professional - - meaning a reallllllly good Child Psychologist (preferably a male one).

Typically at this age, boys are interested in girls, making a good impression and trying to "fit" in.

There are a lot of family dynamics, environment and genetics that can complicate a diagnosis, that is why I suggest a top-notch Dr. to see your son and figure out what his core issues are so he can have a successful adulthood.

Take care,
Boyzmomee replied to momuv4girls's response:
I agree with Momuv. These are not all typical ADHD behaviors and there likely is something else going on.
Sroachca replied to Boyzmomee's response:
He has been seen by a male Psychologist and has been evaluated through school sa well. I think everyone is missing his underlying issues. This is my step-son and his mother and father are both in denial of a serious issue. My heart goes out to him because as he nears the age of 18 his options are limted. He is failing all his classes for the 3rd year in a row. I have read up on Aspergers to see if he could possibly show symptoms of this. It is a really sad to watch him slip away.

Thank you for your help, advice and concern

Sad Step-Mom in San Jose
momuv4girls replied to Sroachca's response:
Hey, I see you are in San Jose.......I live very close by.
Have you checked into this great organization? :

The Bay Area offers a lot of support. What does the school say about his behavior? Surely the school psychologist has observed some of his behaviors in class?

Thats too bad both his parents are in denial of his mental health needs. Any chance you could guide his Dad into seeking help?

I agree, this must be difficult to be a part of and not be able to do anything about it

Take care,
Sroachca replied to momuv4girls's response:
Hi Kathleen,

I will check out school psychologist did not pick up anything unusual except possible depession and anger, which we already knew You are so right I am stuck and have my hands tied. His Dad thinks it is normal behavior and I strongly disagree. I have raised a daughter and now have 2 grandchildren (I have been around I guess you could say) My heart goes out to his son - I just wish I could get inside his head sometimes. I really appreciate the comments and support as I really feel alone in all this.

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