TRIGGS: today is the due date of my fishie baby, they should have been 4 years old... i took the day off like i always do but to my surprise, the hubs took the kids to the sitters (my MIL) and i got to do what i wanted to do for 4 whole hours!
also to my surprise, i have shed no tears about missing my baby. i am not sure if it's because time has healed me some more or that i am content on my family now. i know that Lukas was our last, so i just wonder if that's why...
i am broke so i couldn't go to the cemetary like i normally do on this day and i also couldn't buy the kids a new book like i normally do as well. i am going to do it this weekend instead.
Shana-27, Darrin-29, angel baby (fishie-14w5d) found out @ 17wks. Dx: MTHFR and FV Leiden. BFP 3.12.10 Jennaraya Kailani born 11.16.10 @ 11:48 pm, 8 lbs. 1 oz. 20.25 inches long!
Hugs Shana. It is very hard to deal with and I do find myself thinking of the "what if's". Like what if things didn't happen like they did then where would I be. I think you are getting to the point where you may be coping with things better. Time does help the pain but never makes it truely go away. You will always miss your LO and that is okay. While my mc really took a lot from me, had it not happened I would not have my son with me now and I can't imagine my life without him. That is great that your husband was able to take the kids to the sitters and you were able to have some time to yourself. Its nice to have a little "me time" once in a while. I hope you were able to do something fun.
Heather(26),DH Lee(27). PCOS w Hemmoragic cysts. BFP:1/23/11 M/C 2/10/11. Carson born 3/31/12. BFP 7/28/13 EDD: 4/9/14
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