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annoying comments!!
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bbylove21 posted:
Sorry totally venting today but I'm so annoyed by all my friends who have babies telling me not to be dumb and have one!!"Enjoy life go party and have fun" is all they say since they don't know about this pregnancy...Most of these women unfortunaly have to deal with a baby by them selves i think that makes a differenceve when you have a supportive partner to help out. I mean.. I abolutley know or at least have a pretty good idea it's gonna be a huge 360. but call me naive but i think i can mange,or will learn to manage and yes it will be hectic but i really want to start a family and they don't get that.. Maybe i'm just being soft but i think its a bit insensitive when they say that since i've had a m/c. I would give anything to have that baby around.Anyway maybe they wish they wouldn't have had a baby.. I don't know what do you think my responce should be to my so called friends..or am i being too soft ??
Adriana(21) DH(26) mc at 9 weeks in 5/22/10 BFP!! 9/25/10 EDD 6/29/10 Yay summer baby!! Chicago is cold! Yellow team
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Gonnamissmyson responded:
They are probably just trying to make you feel better but dont understand the sensitivity around m/c. If they say that stuff again I would just say "Thanks I am having TONS of fun!!" It may not be the same type of "fun" they are talking about but what does it matter to them?? As long as you are happy and content with your life it shouldnt matter what anyone thinks and if they are your true friends they should be happy for you. Hope you feel better hun.
Star 26 DD 2 11/25/08 and DS RIP @ 25 weeks due to a encephalocele and a diaphragmatic hernia 07/31/09 BFP 12/02/10!! EDD 08/01/2011 Hoping for a healthy baby, wouldnt hurt if I got my boy!
 
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teacherbeck responded:
Lurking...
I know what you mean... With this pg it would make me so mad when people would say to "enjoy" my sleep/ free time b/c a baby "would change everything." Like you, I felt hurt b/c I had lost a LO, so it felt like they were saying "Look on the bright side, you can sleep all you want, go out with friends, and do whatever you like!"
I agree that most people just don't realize how it feels to hear comments like that when you've had a m/c.. I do believe they usally have good intentions, esp if they are otherwise good friends.
That's why its so nice to have each other b/c we can come on here and vent about the dumb things our friends & loved ones say I hope that venting helped you feel better and I hope your friends gain some sensitivity soon!
Becky (30) DH (37) One brand-new LO, Juliet Christine came Dec 10th (EDD was 12/27), and she is PERFECT! TRIGS: 1 loss (Jackson, Aug 6th '09), story in profile.
 
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bbylove21 replied to Gonnamissmyson's response:
Thanks Star,
I had a really tough childhood and grew up fast and had a ton of fun in the crazyness that was my life. Now i'm so happy to be married and expecting my first child even if i'm 21. I'm an old soul anyway..lol I don't have the best of friends but their intentions are probably not to hurt me.We'll see who sticks around in the long run.
Adriana(21) DH(26) mc at 9 weeks in 5/22/10 BFP!! 9/25/10 EDD 6/29/10 Yay summer baby!! Chicago is cold! Yellow team
 
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alb7585 replied to bbylove21's response:
Adriana I can actually relate to you. I was 21 when I got pregnant with DS and 22 when I had him. People told me to get an abortion, I am giving up my life, I have no idea what I am sacraficing. However, now that I look back at the last three years they have been the best, maybe the hardest but the best. And I am single mom to DS before DF came along so I did it by myself. While DS's dad was out drinking with his buddies I was watching first steps, first smiles, hearing first words. I would NEVER give it up. Though, I will say this, I lost alot of friends but I gained the best thing I could have ever asked for.
Amanda (25), DF (26) and DS (3). Miscarriage July 2010 and BFP in August 2010. Stick baby!! EDD 05/8/2011
 
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bbylove21 replied to teacherbeck's response:
Hey becky your right
people may not have bad intentions ..still very hurtful.I gues im still a little resentful over how they handled my devastating news. i just don't have the ability to pick the best people in the world, But i looove this website it's such an escape i have to remain positive... Like i actually had one of my customers tell me i had a m/c probably cause i reached too much since my job required to pick up boxes and other items..I swear the things ppl say are ridiculous, i obiously was taking care of myself and ...ughh ill stop before it turns into another chapter.. anyway congrats on the new BABY!!!!!!
Adriana(21) DH(26) mc at 9 weeks in 5/22/10 BFP!! 9/25/10 EDD 6/29/10 Yay summer baby!! Chicago is cold! Yellow team
 
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bbylove21 replied to alb7585's response:
That must have been really tough Amanda, Not having anyone there has to be just awful and i couldn't imagine going trough this without any support and love of my DH. So glad you found a good man & are now expecting again : D
Adriana(21) DH(26) mc at 9 weeks in 5/22/10 BFP!! 9/25/10 EDD 6/29/10 Yay summer baby!! Chicago is cold! Yellow team
 
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Mandy_Smiles responded:
Unfortunately I have learned that most comments that my friends or family make about our m/c or our pregnancy are all the wrong comments! People say some of the most insensitive things sometimes without even realizing it is hurtful. I am sorry your friends said the things they said, but I am glad that you have us to vent to!
Mandy 26, DH 31, Angel Baby @ 13weeks April 2010, EDD 3/27/11 and we are thinking about calling her Gwenyth Grace :)


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