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Throw own baby shower?
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jj086 posted:
(I already posted this on the 2nd trimester board, but I thought I'd post it here as well)

I really want a shower for baby #2 which is a girl, due in January. I already have a boy, who was born in the summer. I only really need girl clothes and accessories and maybe a double stroller and that's it. I really just think it's fun to celebrate every baby. The thing is, I have no family that lives and only a handful of friends that live here, all of which have children of there own already. No one has even mentioned throwing me a shower. Should I ask someone to throw me a shower? Or should I throw myself a shower or is that tacky? What's your opinion?
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2kidz4me responded:
nope i thew my own shower with baby number 1 (which was a girl) but that one was a bust noone showed up) but with baby number 2 (a boy) we dicided on more of a get together then a full baby shower.. .. some people told me it was tacky to have another shower but hey. this time im having a boy and my daughter is almost 3 so what they hey.
 
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GreenStudent responded:
That's a good idea to make it more of a get-together and less of a shower. Or if you have a really close friend, you could ask them to throw a shower for you (maybe offer to do all the food, invitations, etc. yourself?). That's probably what I would do.
 
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LinaJean responded:
A possibility... Instead of a baby shower, throw a "baby celebration" Invite all your friends with thier kids and bring your son along. Make it clear that you want to celebrate the coming baby by getting together with friends and all of the children in your life. Also, if you aren't adverse to hand-me-downs, you could get some clothes from anyone you already has a little girl.
 
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BabyTownsend2010 responded:
I was thinking about planning a shower for myself also, because my family can't afford it and for my I have no close friends. I had a shower for my other 3 given by others and the only reason I feel I need to have one with this baby is 1) it's a boy (my other 3 are girls) and 2) my youngest is 4 so I already got rid of all her stuff like crib, swing...everything. I like the ideas of calling it a celebration so maybe when the time comes I'll make invitations inviting ppl to help me celebrate the upcoming birth of my first son. Happy pregnancy
 
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ahutch30 responded:
I think it is completely wrong, not that you want to throw a baby shower but that you want one just because now you are having a boy. The point of having a shower is to have everyone get together and bring you gifts because you don't have anything for your first born. I think if you want to have the girls over and have a get together that is fine, but to throw yourself a shower, no. Then people are expected to bring gifts and if that were me, i would feel awkward bringing a gift because its expected. Now for instance, my cousin has 18 years between her children, well then we threw her a shower b/c clearly she does not have anything from her first born.
 
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ramos1009 responded:
I had 2 showers, a friend shower one weekend and a family shower the next. I threw my own friend shower bc none of my friends offered to, or came up with excuses why they couldn't, but they all showed up. My parents PAID for the shower, but as far as inviting people, decorating, and getting stuff ready, that was all me. I don't see anything wrong with throwing your own shower. I let my friends who have children know that the children were welcome to attend so they wouldn't have to find a baby sitter. I just turned on the Wii and let them play games on it. I didn't get my hopes up on my shower just because I was the one throwing it, but it turned out better than I expected.....I say go for it.
 
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katherine0901 responded:
I threw my own with both babies. Baby number two isn't here yet, but he will be soon. Not to many people came to either one. Just think of it as those are the people who really care and the ones who think it's tacky can kiss... Well you know! I think if you need the help, you should throw one. My son is 5 and I had nothing left from his baby days so I needed the shower because I needed somethings! And because its fun to have a party!! Well Good luck with the decision making! I'd not care what anyone says, celebrate your baby!!! Congrats!
 
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mzguzman08 responded:
hey well I think u should throw ur own babyshower,there's nothing wrong with letting people know u need so baby stuff u don't need to over due it there's like party in a bag decorations and stuff so I say go for it....my husband was gonna make me one but his family is not the people u want to be around hahaha but I just found out my mom and big sis are having a surprise shower so go for it I say...I helped my bf do hers and it was a breeze..
 
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missycatlvr responded:
I think that usually the purpose of a baby shower is to welcome the first born child. Since the first baby can we overwhelming, especially without the proper supplies, individuals will bring gifts to make the transition and process more comfortable. I think it may be best if you purchased the things that you needed for your second child.
 
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fiannakyn responded:
You can always throw your own party. As to it being tacky, I think its acceptable if the space between children is 2+ years (trying to remember fuzzy info from a while ago) but if I read your post right, the children are back to back (maybe even "Irish twins"?) Normally you shouldn't ask for gifts then but I say have a party anyway to celebrate, maybe even make it into a white elephant type? Everyone who has kids bring outgrown clothes and toys and extange with other mothers that may need them. That way you can get something without it being "all about you" My sister had something like this when she confirmed her third was a boy and had no need for girl stuff, so she had a party to extange, and everyone went home happy and my sister got rid of the girls stuff she had and ended up with some cute things she wasn't expecting.
 
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Dmadams619 responded:
I'm not sure why some people think this is wrong. From where I am from (San Diego). EVERYONE I know who has had kids have a baby shower for each child. I don't see what is so wrong with it. Each baby needs their own special gifts.

Throwing your own isnt wrong either, if your friends arent volunteering, then go for it!
 
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sarahlindz6 responded:
I understand where you are coming from. Nobody offered to throw me a bridal shower because I didn't have a bridal party and it was a destination wedding so I asked a close friend if she would help write the invitations and say she was throwing it for me but I paid for everything. She was happy to help because she couldn't afford to throw me one. So I'd say, in my opinion, throwing one for yourself isn't tacky, but if I got one in the mail and someone was throwing it for themself I'd think its bad manners but if I knew they needed the help I would go, and of course if it was a friend who I valued I would help in any way I could. Another idea - you could have the father, if he is around, have a diaper keg party: if you bring a bag of diapers you receive a cup for the keg. The host buys pizza or makes food, etc. Its a great way to celebrate the new baby, have fun, and make the dad feel special too. Now this is not very nice BUT it gets you off the hook of having your own party: return some of the diapers to a store, get credit, and use the credit for baby clothes, onesies, etc. Its not very moral but don't tell anyone, its a way to get by in this recession and not necessarily hurt anyone's feelings.
 
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orin34 responded:
LOL.. . . I am from southern california and like Dmadams619 said..... People here have babyshowers for each child. They may not ask for the BIG things (like a new crib....they just reuse from the older child) but there are always small things that do add up.... burp cloths, ect....

Also... My family is BIG into crafts.... quilting, knitting, sewing, painting ... and they believe that each child should have their own handmade (fill in the blank)..... as a result every babyshower in my family has a package from my mom that has a quilt... an knitted blanket from my grandmothers... a painting from my sister...and so on.... Just because you had a shower for your first child doesn't mean that every subsequent baby gets left out


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