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to snip or not to snip?
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wifeyintraining posted:
At my first prenatal appointment today the doctor asked me if we had a boy if we'd want to circumcise. I have very mixed feelings on the whole circumcision thing. Part of me thinks that its an unnecessary procedure, and I'd hate to make that decision for my possible future son that he can never reverse. Most of the nerve endings are in the foreskin, and as long as we teach him how to keep it clean, he shouldn't have any problems.... my boyfriend thinks that we should do it. He's afraid that when our boy grows up, girls will be grossed out by an uncircumcised penis.

Any opinions on this issue? I'm really kind of torn on the whole issue. My mom thinks the decision should be up to the father, but i feel like i should have a say in it too! I haven't done a whole lot of research on the topic recently.. but I'd like to hear some opinions!
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momtoD responded:
We circumcised our boys (twins), our best friends have three boys (fourth on the way) and don't circumcise....for us (our friends included) it's about looking like Dad...it's not uncommon for little guys to be either. Sometimes when I think of what they did during the procedure though it makes me sick to my stomach...the procedure is painful but they aren't scarred for life by it...it's really just a personal preference thing...Good luck! And BTW I know a girl that didn't have her son circomcised and when it got infected a diaper wouldn't fit over it, and the head was the size of a golf ball...
 
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hdannels1 responded:
DH and I just had this conversation last night. DH is circumsized, but I think he might resent the fact that he had no choice. I didn't really have any views on it yet, because I don't have one, I don't know what the pros and cons are. So I talked to him about it, and we decided not to, that way, our son could choose on his own. It is a procedure that can be done later in life, so if he chooses to do so, that is fine, but neither me or DH feel like we should be the ones to make that call. And, in the end, we are on the Yellow team, so we may not have to make the decision in the end anyway We are just hoping for a boy lol

And yes, you should have a say in it too, it's your son
 
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RAgirl29 responded:
my DH was not circumcised when he was an infant and resented his dad for making the decision to not have it done when he was a baby. He wanted it done, but had to wait until he was 18! It was extrememly painful...as you can imagine, but he went through the procedure. We are now expecting our first chlid, a son, and my husband says we are definitely getting our son circumcised because he knows first hand if it happens later, it will be very painful. My opinion is to have it done at the hospital when he is born...i know it's painful either way, but at least if it's done early, he won't remember it.

Wife (Val) 32, DH (Carlos) 38, Baby boy due March 27, 2009!
 
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StephanieJSS responded:
When we have a boy we will have ours circumsized...My husband is not... There are good points and bad points...The reason we are is just because you have to keep it cleaned sooo much better...Under the skin and everything...If the boys don't keep it clean it can get infected, and they can give their partners yeast infections, they can get yeast infections...DH is lucky he is sooo clean...He hasn't ever had any problems BUT you never know how your son will be when he gets older...JMO!!!HTH!!!
 
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monkeyj8 responded:
I have heard this argument on several different blogs and have not heard any good reasons to NOT have it done, only reason TO have it done, such as: infection from not keeping it clean, most little boys don't want to deal with that, what about when they are camping or something, they are gonna have to have some cleaner of some kind everywhere with them, to avoid infection. Also giving their sex partner STD's or UTI's because of the dirtiness getting in the female. Also, the boy being angry with parents who didnt do it when they were a baby and having it done later in life hurts way worse. Ive heard from several parents that babies cry way worse when they are constipated or have gas than when they were circumsized, so that isnt a good excuse. I just feel that it is an extra piece of skin which only carries germs, and that it is better removed when they are a baby. I know it's your decision but I would say do it, what will it hurt, he's not gonna even know it was a big deal unless you make it a big deal, especially if his dad has a circumsized penis.
 
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wifeyintraining responded:
RAgirl29:

I wanted to ask you, what were your husbands reasons for being circumsized later in life? did he have problems with infections?

everyone else:

Thank you so much for your opinions! It was very helpful! I'm really still leaning towards not getting it done, and i think i've just about convinced daddy the same. Everything i've looked up about it says that it isn't really that hard to clean, they just have to make it a regular part of their bathing routine. They say you don't have to clean it at all until it naturally retracts, which can be anytime from birth until they are 5. Plus, i've known men who WERE circumsized and still had to take special care of pulling back extra skin and cleaning it since every doctor cuts differently since there is no defined spot where the skin becomes the foreskin, some have more left than others.

I don't know, i just really hate the idea of cutting off an inch before they know they have it! (joke of my dad's) And i hate the idea of the procedure all together! tbh i'm kind of hoping i have a girl so i dont have to make the decision at all!!! Like i've said before, i just hate making that decision for my future son!

I still have al ot of time to think about it, but i'm hoping this post can go on for anyone else unsure about circumcision.
 
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RAgirl29 responded:
He didn't have any infections, but noticed when he cleaned it daily, it would have collected a white pasty substance...he thought it was yeast, or something. ( Sorry - I know that sounds kind of gross). He said the reason he had it done, was because he didn't want it to turn into some sort of infection and figured being circumsized would eliminate that problem.
 
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bodoba responded:
I'm from Canada and there it costs $400 to get your son circumsized because it isn't covered and most doctors won't do it because it is considered a cosmetic surgery. My husband is adamant on getting our son circumsized and I have seen the procedure and am very uncomfortable with it. I told him he has to change the bloody diapers and deal with his pain when trying to urinate through a scab because knowing the post partum problems I had last time I won't be able to handle the guilt of doing that to my innocent son. That's what we decided.
 
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Aspruill responded:
2 sons and both were clipped. Both times almost completely healed in a week and neither seemed to show any discomfort afterwards, even during changing. It really doesn't leave that big of an ouchie either...just a thin scab around the outside of the head. If you do...they will give you some ointment and if I'm not mistaken it has a slight numbing agent in it to help any pain that first day. After that basically keep it dry. I used Vaseline.
 
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betterman responded:
we just found out a few weeks ago that my fiance is pregnant! this is my first child, she's got an 8 yo daughter. this topic has gone thru my head many times, and we've talked briefly about it. my feelings are kind of mixed, but i think if we do have a boy we probably will have him circumsized. mainly because i am, so when it comes to potty training or just seeing me nude he won't think he's some sort of freak, and my fiance also feels that circumsized is the way to go. and i know that giving him the choice could be good, but as many others have said if it's done at birth he will never remember it and it'll heal quickly...if he waits till adulthood it's a much more painful procedure with more healing time than a modern vasectomy is from what i've heard. btw, i plan on getting a vasectomy after we have a successful pregnancy/birth. 2 is enough
 
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renayiiq responded:
Ok, I know this is a few months old, but I'd like to share my opinion on it. My husband and I have decided that if we have a boy, we're going to get him circumsized. I'm a Jew, and so, I believe that having an uncircumsized penis in unclean. In my past, I had sex with an uncircumsized man once, and I felt so gross and dirty afterwards. I didn't know until the clothes were all off and it was time to get busy -- I figured there was no turning back at that point, and not speaking up about it and/or not saying no was one of the biggest mistakes I ever made.
 
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mom2zaine responded:
My husband was circumcised,and so when our son was born, I left the decision to my husband (after all,what would I know about it?) But as soon as they took him back,i regretted it terribly! I spent the next hour crying. My precious baby boy,what did he do to deserve this terrible pain? I have regretted it ever since.

Sure,he won't remember it,but who are we to inflict undue pain on an innocent baby,for the sake of physical appearance? I had to think,if this were being done to girls (you know what I mean) what would our attitude be? The fact is,you're not a bad parent just because you do this to your son. But it is a very painful experience to have to endure, especially so soon after birth. For your possible future son's sake, please do plenty of research on this subject. This is another one of those decisions we get to make as new parents, where every one has a strong opinion on the subject. Please visit attachmentparenting.com they have a more enlightened view of parenting,and raising children in general. Best of luck!!
 
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misundastQQd responded:
Im glad for this post. I never thought that it hurt babyboy bad to get that done. I'm prego with another lil girl. But, thats crazy. This post just really opened my mind up to it. Even though I think uncircumcised is gross, Its not that bad if taught hygiene well. So if ever I have a son. No, I won't do it.
 
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tabby62010 responded:
We decided to have our son circumcised for cleanliness reasons. My hubby isn't but his looks like it is, it doesn't have too much of any foreskin.

I'm glad we did it for my son. I saw my sister's 3 year old son with an uncircumcised penis, and it looked gross. She couldn't afford it, but otherwise she would have had it done, as well.

My son is busy, busy, busy. I don't want him to have any problems later on in life with cleanliness issues. If we have another boy, he'll too be circumcised. Better now than later!


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