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    Make Every Day Valentine's Day
    Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD posted:
    One great way to honor the stated purpose of Valentine's Day is to use it as a reminder to live each day with your love in mind. You can do this by committing yourself to do the following on every day through the year:

    Reaffirm to yourself just how precious your relationship is.

    Take time to think about memories of good times together.

    Take time to think about your partner's positive qualities.

    Listen for what makes your partner happy; and find a way to give those things to him or her.

    What are ways that you show and affirm your love through the year?

    If you would like to read more about this topic in The Art of Relationships blog, please click here .

    Dr. Becker-Phelps's discussions and her responses in those discussions are for general educational purposes only. If you need help for an emotional or behavioral problem, please seek the assistance of a psychologist or other qualified mental health professional.
    dfromspencer responded:
    Hi, Dr. Becker-Phelps

    Hi, all!!! I've been away from Web.M.D. for some time, its good to be back! Its taking longer to recover from my surgery than i thought it would! My back hurt so bad, it was hard to sit in my office chair and type. So, i put my recouperation first.

    The ways i used to show and confirm my love, was to always do those little things, without being asked. You know, like taking out the garbage, cleaning the toilet, and keeping the sink, or shower drain free of hair. Plus, i would bring her flowers for no particular reason. Look her in the eye's, and tell her what she means to me. Tell her i love her, every day. Make romantic dinners, complete with candle light, most every night. Offer to do things for her, especially when she was tired. On days when she was especially tired, or stressed, i would give her a sensual massage. It worked every time! LOL!

    Those are just some of the things i did, or said, to affirm my love for not only my wife, (now an ex) but for every woman i ever felt love for.

    Its kinda funny, i never felt like it was a job, or a chore to do? It was something i always wanted to do, if it made them happy, i was happy!!!!


    lostlove2011 replied to dfromspencer's response:
    I agree with Dennis: just by being a pleaser and going the extra mil eto do the little things: it made me happy too. I guess I felt like I was a good wife, and I was for trying to make him happy. I wanted to take care of all of his needs at home, so he would feel good about what we had, and the wife he had chose. I have thought about it a thousand time: would I be the same in the future with other loves,, the answer is yes. 1) that's who I am 2) I'm going to find someone like Dennis eventuall,y who not only appreciates it, but reciprocates just b/c he really wants to. Dennis, I think its wonderful that you are doing those things, I wish all men felt as you do, and I think many of them do. I think its very important that 2 people be on the same page, it makes for a unhappy situation when one gives 100% while the other only takes 100%..
    dfromspencer replied to lostlove2011's response:
    Hi, LostLove

    Sorry to hear you lost that love! It seems we are destined to find the ONE love of our lives, but my clock is running down, and i have yet to find her. I hope you do find your ONE like me! I love to be very attentive to the one i'm with, and why not? If she loves the attention, i get it back in spades, you know? Plus, it doesn't hurt to like doing things like that for yourself, also. I hate a dirty, or messy house, so i like to clean things. And, i love to cook!!! My mother, may she rest in peace, got me interested in cooking when i was just a lad of 13. I'm not much in to fried foods, so i love to bake and broil things in the oven. My mother even taught me how to knit, but that was so very long ago. I never kept up with it, so i lost that knowledge, sad. I could sew a button on a shirt, if i had to.

    I believe exactly what you believe, if you are both on the same page, it would make for a wonderful life! I sincerely hope you find your ONE!!! I will keep looking till my time runs out! At 54, i don't have a whole lotta time left. Life goes by so quickly!

    I wish you all the best life has to offer!!!!

    LUVishere replied to dfromspencer's response:
    Dennis, I SOO disagree, to me, 54 is very, very young!! Do not get down, despair, or feel hopeless! You sound like a wonderful man, and no doubt that you WILL make some lady an amazing husband. I know this. I'm only 40, and still feel like I am 20. I feel more beautiful and happier with "who" I am than ever before. I am very very unhappy with my life, but I am planning on a way out. It may take a while, but I know that I will be happy for the rest of my life. I'm a happy, go lucky person, and I too, will meet the one, and be happy. I am positive of that, BUT I will not let it occupy my time. One of my favorite things to do is cater to my love, and I will eventually find someone like yourself taht likes it all, likes pleasing me as well, likes catering to me, and we will wrestle over doing nice things for the other... I know that their has got to be more men like you. I personally think its very very wise, it makes you happy, and yes, it comes back 10 fold. Keep your head up! Your light cant shine, if they cant see the light in your eyes!!
    dfromspencer replied to LUVishere's response:
    Hi, again!

    You are so right! I will never let my head fall down, how would i see the love of my life comming, if i did? LOL!!! I know for a fact, its the possitive one's like us, that WILL find the ONE!!! We are the happy go lucky's thru life! Never let the negative bother you, and i won't either! There are many more like us, than not, i hope?

    I wish you all the best!!!


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