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    Only have one sibling and little contact
    Anon_11642 posted:
    Hi - I only have one sibling - a sister who lives 1700 miles away - all my life she has never had much time for me but seems to be trying but then not too much.

    Her problem is she is always so busy and has no time for me - I decided a few years ago that I would not call her and told her that but hope she would call me when she has time to talk.

    Well, I am weakening and been calling her - she texted me she was too busy yesterday but would try today - her words are meaningless so I never take her seriously as she usually doesn't follow through.

    I get lonely and am retired and want to be more useful but some days I just hate it and it's hard getting through the day - anyway - I would love to talk to her but it isn't happening. My daughter says you know she has always been like that so accept it. I know - she is right but I have a need - only family I have where I live is a daughter and son - but they too are so busy.

    I told my husband no one has time for anybody anymore - anyway - just feeling sad and lonely and wanted to post. Am going to my church group in a little bit and looking forward to that at least.

    Maybe I expect too much out of life - anyway - thanks for listening to me today.
    dfromspencer responded:
    I can completely relate to that. I have a brother that is the same way. I can never get him to call me, or to even mail me a letter. I know he has his own things to do, but come on, a phone call is not too much to ask. Is it???

    Don't worry about being weak, that is only normal. She is your sister first and foremost. You both grew up together, that is hard to leave alone. You both have that family connection, its so hard to let them go. I don't see any reason you cannot call her? Go ahead, be weak, she is your sister after all!!!

    Are you keeping busy with your hobbies? Are you still working in the medical office? You said they would accept you for one day a week, right? As long as you can keep busy, missing your sister will be less acute. Have you thought about un-retiring? Going back to work full time? If you are physically capable, why not? That alone will take up the lions share of your time. Keeping busy is what you sound like you need? Your husband still works full time on the farm, right? So, why not you? Maybe even a part time job, one that takes you away from home for at least half the day?

    Concider your options, if your hobbies are not enough, and your friend time is not enough, a job may not be so bad, eh?

    I hope some of this may help? Take care!!!

    Anon_11642 replied to dfromspencer's response:
    You are right - they never called back and then I thought if it is God's will for me to work that one day then they would call - haven't heard - then I think should I call or not - I guess I'm worried that maybe it is not the thing I need - not sure what to do now.

    Not sure what I need - all I know for sure is that I have too much time on my hands and when that happens I get depressed and start worrying about everything which is not good.

    Keeping busy is the key but think I need to be around people and feel better when I am - it is a good distraction.

    Anyway, trying to still figure this thing out - in a small town it is more of a worry because if you do take this one day a week job and don't like it everyone in town will know - I know I shouldn't worry about what people think but I just like people to think good of me.

    Anyway, trying hard to figure something out. I babysat my grandson just now for 1-1/2 hours which helped distract me - see even that helped.

    Retirement isn't for everybody - we need to feel useful to society in some way even though I do some volunteer work it is still not enough to keep my mind busy.

    Thanks for listening.

    Some people are content being alone - and sometimes it is nice but not always.
    rohvannyn replied to Anon_11642's response:
    It wouldn't hurt to call the part time job folks back. The worst they can say is "no thanks." On keeping busy, it's awesome that you do volunteer work. How about auditing a class or two at a local college? Often they will let you sit in on classes for little to no cost. You could meet people and get out of the house that way. There are also free online courses available if transportation is a problem. Just a thought. Best of luck with everything.

    'Your focus determines your reality.' --QGJ

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