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Advice needed in 8 year relationship and still not married
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dmr35 posted:
I have been with my fiance for 8.5 years, we have been engaged for 6. my fiance is 55 and has 2 children 27 and 25 and has been a widower for 18 years. I am 51 and have 3 children 23, 21 and 16.
When we started dating, his mother was living with him to help raise his children and she did not want him to get married. He btw has been retired since I met him. I was very up front with him and told him that I was seeking a life partner and wanted to eventually marry again and share my life with someone. we both own homes, I however, have been struggling for years, just getting by, working very hard to maintain stability for my children. He did not have to work and had 2 adults home, raising his children. The children needed that, as they did lose their mom.

He proposed to me 6 years ago, his mother became upset and he kept stalling the plans. We were going to add an addition to my home, because it was larger and I even offered to put in law set up in. HE WOULD BECOME DEFENSIVE every time I spoke about plans. I was resentful, angry and ended our relationship several times, only to go back to him after he made promises that we would move forward. I was struggling and he hardly ever helped me, did not work and I guess I feel he did not care enough because he watched. I even mowed my own lawn and he didn't, work, never offered financial help and we were engaged and I was struggling.
Fast forward... his mom passed away 2 years ago and we are still not married. At this point, his kids do not want to move in with us and it is understandable, after all, they are grown ups. I have so much resentment because I feel like I put my dreams on hold and I am still waiting. I am not sure what to do. PLEASE! ANY ADVICE
I feel like, he has been selfish and just did not care about my needs. I put what I wanted on hold and as a result, struggled and worked extra jobs while he sat home and watched. I wanted a partner to work together with life goals. Am I unreasonable?

Amy advice will help

Thank you
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dmr35 responded:
One more thing, his children do not want to move in to my home but, are also not ready to live on there own yet.
 
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dfromspencer responded:
I replied to your earlier post, even with this new info, I still suggest you run!

Sure, you have lost so much time on this manchild, but no, don't torture yourself any longer, there are way better men out there, go get a real man!!!

Dennis
LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!
 
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dmr35 replied to dfromspencer's response:
Thank you, I am in need of all advice. I am leaning toward this, because I am so resentful.


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