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Stressed out
lakiyaih posted:
I have been in a relationship with my husband for four years. We just got married last June, and already we are getting a divorce. The problems are many, but mainly it's about two things. My husband is the main bread winner and if he gets mad, he'll tell me to get out. It's been going on as long as we've been living together. My husband was very emotionally abusive in the past, I mean like not talking to me for weeks at a time, ignoring me and my feelings. Finally I got fed up with him and dumped him. He lasted two weeks and I told him no more. Well now things are going back that way. The most recent example is his dog. I cannot say anything negative about his dog. I just said how annoying it is when we are eating and the dog stares at you. He flips out and tells me his dog comes first and if I don't like I can leave. Also, we don't have sex. I mean in four years we've probably had sex less than 15 times. He has ED and refuses to take pills. When I bring it up he just changes subject or tells me to find another man. He ignored my birthday and we got into a big fight and he said who cares it's your bday. I tell him he hurts me, but just says I'm being dramatic. I can't afford to move, but I'm sick inside. I don't see things changing, but am embarrassed to tell anyone we're getting divorce. Can this marriage be saved. I don't want to live like this
thankmetwice responded:
Well I am sorry to say, some things don't change. Sometimes it is best to move forward before the relationship get worse. Your husband has low self esteem problems, because of things in the past and he won't let go nor will he seek some help. He is proud.

Doesn't like to ask for help. Everyone needs to be loved, it's just some people don't know how to show it. And maybe it is due to the child he's had.

Please yourself, and make sure you do something to better yourself in the process. And sometimes you can help someone by moving on.

I feel the same way when going through some things with my spouse. I had to go get some help just to see if I was crazy or not. Yes, I have done things that I am not proud of.

But, I found myself doing the things that I did because I felt I made a big mistake in getting married. I felt like I could just kick myself for marrying the wrong person. But, I still continued to get the marriage back on track. And yet, there is a time where you just say enough.

I hope this helped. Always keep your head up high, because you are better than that.

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