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Includes Expert Content
stepping,out,of myself is not easy when there is no teust
An_255450 posted:
there are times thtt i have stepped out of who iam.,wnting,to move,forward. but,winds up,is getting,burned worse then before.,i,stay to myself.,there is no way i allow myself to be emotionlly tourted anymore
Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD responded:
You may not feel it right now, but simply because you are a person, you are very worthwhile and deserve to be loved. Truly feeling this deep inside is a goal that you might want to set for yourself. Learning to feel this way frees many people from their pain.

When people feel this much pain, they need to find something that is healthy to soothe themselves. Find someone who is safe to share with -- like you are doing in this community. Do things that are nurturing- like reading a book, taking a bath or shower, or watching a movie. Too often the problem with trying to protect yourself from pain by isolating is that it only ends up hurting you more. So, it can help to find your safety places, activities, and people and engage with them. Then you might be ready to take some small steps out from there. And remember to work with your therapist on helping you to ease your pain and increase the good things in your life. (You have a therapist, right? If not, I strongly suggest you find one.) It also helps people to learn how to recognize love in the world and in their lives.
dfromspencer responded:
Come on, Dem, you know you can trust us, right?! No one here will ever torture you, in any way, shape, or form!!! We want this to be a trusted place for you, you know that, right?

Why don't you let us help you to see a path forward? We, every one of us here, wants to help you!!! No one here wants to harm you, or torture you, no, we just want to be your friend!!!

Won't you let us be that friend?

dem03 replied to dfromspencer's response:
love you,all
dem03 replied to dem03's response:
my therapist is awesome. he does not serously mentally ill as he sees it i just need to have a better sel worth in myself and make better choices.
dfromspencer replied to dem03's response:
Hi Dem,

Damn straight!!! You are not mental, just scared!!! Yes, your self worth needs improving! So, lets get with it, and see what we can do, ok???

Let me guess, you had a hubby that told you you were worthless, right? He said you could never do better than him, right? WRONG!!!

Everyone is worthy of whatever they want, need, or desire!!! Everyone has self worth! Whatever someone told you is just plain trash! You, Dem, are very worthy!!! Worthy of love, and trust, and hope, and whatever else you want!!! Everyone is worthy of whatever it is they want, they just have to go get it!!!

Go get it, Dem, go get it!!! Please read Dr. Becker-Phelps's blogs on her site, you will never regret it! If you need help understanding something, just ask, one of us will help you, I promise!!!

Your counselor is right, just listen to him! Happy V-day, Dem!

Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD replied to dem03's response:
One way that people often help themselves feel better is by doing at least one thing each day that feels good to them -- and then letting themselves take in that it does make them happy or satisfied. Maybe it would help to share here some things you like to do?
An_251552 responded:
know exactly how you feel mate.
it hurts when I try to step out of the world
but I'm fighting with myself, all the time, it hurts that way too and most of the time I get lost on the arguments I made to myself. it sucks. sometimes I wanna give up life
dfromspencer replied to An_251552's response:
Hi An_251552,

I'm sorry you are feeling like this? No one should feel so "outside" of life, that you feel you need to step out? May I ask why, why are you fighting with yourself? If you ask me, we have enough to fight about in this world, we don't need to fight ourselves, too?

If you keep getting "lost" on the arguments you have made to yourself, why not write them down as they come? Then, when you need to, you can just pull that out, and there you have it?!

Can I also ask you what you mean by, "I try to step out of the world"? I hope it doesn't mean what I think it does? That, would not be good!!!

We are here for you, feel free to ask questions, or jump in and help someone else?!!! This is a great place to find help and support, and to give help and support!!! Please come join us???

I wish you tons of luck!!!


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