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INSTALLING A HUSBAND
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singlesadvice posted:


Dear Tech Support,

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slowdown in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0. In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as: Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as : NBA 5.0, NFL 3.0 and Golf Clubs 4.1 Al so Conversation 8.0 no longer runs, and House cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

DEAR DESPERATE,

First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update. If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5.

However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1. Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.

Whatever you do, DO NOT, under any circumstances, install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)

In addition, please do not attempt to re-install the Boyfriend 5.0 program. These are unsupported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend: Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.

Good Luck!
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dfromspencer responded:
Very funny!!!


Now where is Girlfriend 5.0, and Wife 1.0??? Oh, that's right, men automatically get the Mother-in-law 1.0, so where is the rest of OUR fun programs?


Say what??? Downloading Girlfriend 5.0 automatically gets us the Mother-in-law app, and it automatically starts when we say "I do"? Wow, that really is a virus!!!


Guys, avoid Mother-in-law app by never downloading the Girlfriend 5.0, just rent the disc over night, then return it the next day!


Problem solved!!!


Good Luck!


LOL!!!


Dennis
LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!
 
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gd9900 replied to dfromspencer's response:
haha what fun!! In my case husband 1.0 ended up being a virus that slowly infected marriage 1.0 which was an add-on program to the boyfriend 5.0 upgrade. After 5 years, beer 6.1 self-installed. After 9 years husband 1.0 stopped functioning properly and became incompatible with wife 1.0 and the current operating system. Husband 1.0 attempted reinstalling boyfriend 5.0 on a newer operating system but failed to do so successfully. Husband 1.0 successfully uninstalled from current operating system but left behind local keys for smoother reinstallation if a newer operating system wasnt available. Lo and behold one became available unbeknownst to previous operating system. Once boyfriend 5.0/husband 1.0 successfully installed baby 1.0 onto new gf 2.0s operating system, divorce 1.0 downloaded onto wife 1.0s operating system and wiped out all local keys. When divorce 1.0 finished installing, facebook revealed ex husband 5.0s secret upgrades. Wife 1.0 upgraded to livingahappierlifesingle 10.0 along with upgrading the operating system and adding virus protection.


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