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    Porn searches
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    An_258443 posted:

    My friend says she knows her husband watches porn and she's okay with that but recently she checked his history and found out he searches porn sites for "rape, hard anal, gagging" and things like that. I asked if she's ever been abused by him she said no, never! but the searches makes her really uncomfortable. Is that a concern or normal?
    Reply
     
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    rohvannyn responded:
    It's something to watch out for, sure, but I think she should only be worried if she sees the pattern continuing and his searches becoming more extreme. Why? Curiosity. You might be amazed at the odd things that get searched, when the person looking at them would never ever do those things. Sometimes it's morbid curiosity, the "wow, do they really make porn of THAT?" type question, or the question "am I in to that, or is it gross?" Sometimes, even if a person secretly likes a subject, they are moral beings so they keep it strictly to fantasy and never act on it.

    If her husband keeps looking at those things and gets more extreme with it, THEN it might be something to be worried about it.

    By the way, is he okay with the fact that she's checking his search history?
    Roh

    'Your focus determines your reality.' --QGJ
     
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    dfromspencer responded:
    Hi, i am with Roh on this. Most men, myself included, have looked at different types of porn, would I ever do that to another human being? Hell no! Her hubby probably won't either, but she should tell him about her looking into his things?! Otherwise, he is going to be offended, or even hurt by that? This is a trust issue, she should trust her hubby, but I don't see that?

    I think she should bring this topic up in a nice quiet place, no children, or others around. Then she needs to ask him if he would like to talk about his searches, and immediately apologize for her curiosity quickly, before that settles in?! Tell him her curiosity got the better of her, and swear it will never happen again.

    No, i don't see how his curiosity of this type of porn should set alarm bells ringing? Just be more observant, from now on? No, not by snooping in his things, somethings a man does, needs to be kept on the down low! Know what i mean?

    I hope some of this helps your friend! Good luck to her!!!

    Dennis
    LIVE LONG, LOVE WELL!!!


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