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    Finding the right partner
    Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD posted:
    There is a lot that goes into finding the "right" partner. In my book, Insecure in Love, I identify some attributes that provide a rough guideline for finding the "ideal" partner. For instance, I suggest that people look for a partner who is secure with themselves, open to emotional intimacy, an effective communicator, and ready for a relationship.

    What are some things you look for in a partner? Or, if you are in a relationship, what are some qualities in your partner that tell you the person is "right" for you?

    If you would like to read more in detail about this topic in my The Art of Relationships blog, click here .

    Dr. Becker-Phelps's discussions and her responses in those discussions are for general educational purposes only. If you need help for an emotional or behavioral problem, please seek the assistance of a psychologist or other qualified mental health professional.

    dfromspencer responded:
    Amazing! After reading the blog, i found that i have indeed looked for these attributes in my selection process. Wow, i had never even thought about it, it seemed to be automatic?

    This must be some kind of internal thinking process, or something like? Sometimes i would think to myself out loud about certain topics? Topics like; is she mentally adult? That is because of two other ladies that prided themselves on their seeming maturity? But, no sooner said than done, they act immature, on several different things. (Be careful not to prove it to them) So, i will no longer date anyone under the age of 35!!! At the age of 35, it seems that that is about the age they mentally mature, just like us guys! Some, both sexes, never seem to want to mature?

    Too many times, we chose a mate by looks alone. Myself included! Only to find we are no match at all?! I like the process Dr. Leslie has outlined in her book! There is probably more, but this one is pretty darned fine, if you ask me?! Now, if only more people used this outline, there would be far less divorces than there is now!

    You know what they say; "The leading cause of divorce today is marriage"!

    Thank you once again, Dr. Leslie!!! Another thought provoking topic that can be used by all! Amazing, you never cease to amaze me with your writings!!! Please, by all means, keep them coming!!!

    Take care!

    Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD replied to dfromspencer's response:
    Thanks, Dennis.

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