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Includes Expert Content

Trust

An_245814 posted:

Hi,

Could you tell me your thoughts on a married man texting a women(lesbian)? about "work" and then deleting the messages from the phone? The only reason I knew about them was because of the phone records. Mistrust

4 Replies |Watch This Discussion | Report This| Share this:TrustHi, Could you tell me your thoughts on a married man texting a women(lesbian)? about "work" and then deleting the messages from the phone? The only reason I knew about them was because of the phone records. Mistrust

FCL responded:

Why is this bothering you? What has he done in the past to make you distrust him? If the woman works with him then where's the problem.

For the record, I have no idea who my partner texts and calls. I do not need to know. He's a big boy and I trust him. Why are you making a big deal about this?

There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

Report This| Share this:TrustWhy is this bothering you? What has he done in the past to make you distrust him? If the woman works with him then where's the problem. For the record, I have no idea who my partner texts and calls. I do not need to know. He's a big boy and I trust him. Why are you making a big deal about this?

Chris_WebMD_Staff responded:

Hiya,

I agree with FCL. I'm wondering if he deleted it because he thought your past behavior indicated that it might upset you to find it. Your best bet is to talk to him about this and not look into his records. If you don't trust him you need to confront him, and if you do, let this go. Either way I'm thinking you need to communicate with your hubby. Good luck and let us know how things go!

Chrissy~

Life is too short, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
Author Unknown

Report This| Share this:TrustHiya, I agree with FCL. I'm wondering if he deleted it because he thought your past behavior indicated that it might upset you to find it. Your best bet is to talk to him about this and not look into his records. If you don't trust him you need to confront him, and if you do, let this go. Either way I'm thinking you need to communicate with your hubby. Good luck and let us know how things go!

sa_guitarplayer responded:

In my opinion,
A woman who is lesbian poses no "threat" to you. Friendship, colleagues, teammates, whatever their relationship; it's probably 100% platonic.
He may have deleted the texts because of her name alone, "Suzie" or "Joan" etc... might look suspicious to the less-informed. If she is in fact gay, why worry about it? Would you worry about texts from "Jim" or "Samuel" ?

Report This| Share this:TrustIn my opinion, A woman who is lesbian poses no "threat" to you. Friendship, colleagues, teammates, whatever their relationship; it's probably 100% platonic. He may have deleted the texts because of her name alone, "Suzie" or "Joan" etc... might look suspicious to the less-informed. If she is in fact gay, why worry about it? Would you worry about texts from "Jim" or "Samuel" ?

Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD responded:

Is there more to your mistrust than just this incident? Has there been (or are there) other problems in your relationship? Have you been hurt before in other relationships by some kind of betrayal?

Report This| Share this:TrustIs there more to your mistrust than just this incident? Has there been (or are there) other problems in your relationship? Have you been hurt before in other relationships by some kind of betrayal?

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