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looking for love ... soulmate and dnt knw where to start
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An_247925 posted:
been looking for love every since my boyfriend got killd it so hard for me to deal with him gone its been a year i just want someone who will understand a little...... our son looks just like him but i am in need for love ....
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BalconyBelle responded:
I'm truly sorry for your loss...but your grief is something that you'll have to deal with before you can move on. It sounds as though you haven't taken time to let yourself mourn; instead, you've been focused on trying to find someone that will fill that void in your life. It will be difficult while you're still grieving.

That sadness, and the need for love and closeness are completely understandable--but your chances of finding a new romance and having it work out are slimmer as long as you continue to look while still eaten up with grief over the love you've lost. I'd recommend counseling if at all possible, and taking some time for yourself to truly come to grips with his passing. Right now you're hurting, and you need to take some time for the pain to fade before you'll be able to give yourself (and a new guy) the best chance for success.
 
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kisha252 replied to BalconyBelle's response:
THANKS FOR THE ADVISE ... I REALLY DO JUST NEED TO TALK TO SOMEONE WHO MIGHT COULD JUST UNDERSTAND IM LEARNING TO DEAL WITH BUT ITS HARD I WALK AROUND WITH A SMILE ON MY FACE AND HOLD MY HEAD HIGH BUT NO ONE WILL EVER KNW ITS KILLING MY INSIDES
 
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Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD replied to kisha252's response:
Is there anyone you can talk with about this? Someone willing to listen and who you think can be open to hearing your pain? I think this is extremely important to find. Maybe you have this in a family member, good friend, or clergy? If not, please consider finding a support group and/or therapist.

While I think you probably need to do this face-to-face, you can also share more here about the pain you feel inside. There is a community of people here who I think are open to "listening" to you.


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