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Art of Relationships:
What If My Partner Doesn't Share My Faith?
Why Avoiding Conflict Can Cause Problems

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Anon_228486 posted:
hey guys,i v been sleeping with a guy for some months,he has had good orgasms,but i just had one and it lasted a few secends,i dont feel ok with it,but when i masterbate after afew minutes it happens,so it shows that im not abnormal.but i dont know why i cant reach to an orgasm while i am with me plz:(
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Caprice_WebMD_Staff responded:
Hi and welcome to WebMD,

I encourage you to repost your concerns and question on the following board:

Sexual Health Community

Once you're there, hold your cursor over the orange Post Now button and choose 'Discussion' from the drop down menu which appears. Fill in the subject line with the topic you want to discuss and then fill in the body of the message with your concerns and question. And then Submit.

You don't ever need to share your email address when you post online. In fact, it's inadvisable to do so for your own safety and privacy.

If you end up wanting this post removed to protect that privacy, let us know by clicking on the Report This link beneath your post here, choosing 'other' and explaining that you'd like it removed for privacy reasons..

FYI, your issue is not at all unusual and I'm sure the folks on our Sexual Health community can help.
Bessieboy responded:
Your SO needs some help in satisfying you first. Women need 20 minutes of clitoral foreplay and you need to orgasm first. Then he can enter and bring you to a vaginal orgasm as he finishes. Wife first, husband second will give the wife the big O 50 0/0 of the time. It has worked for me for 48 years and my wife loves it!
fcl replied to Bessieboy's response:
Actually, although I agree that most women would love 20 minutes of foreplay I think most of us would like it to be distributed all over our bodies and not concentrated solely on the clitoris. When only one area gets stimulated for such an extended period of time:

1. It gets raw and painful

2. We feel somewhat used as you are ignoring the rest of our erogenous zones. As if you're only doing it to hasten sex...

No offence intended - only information
There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
Leslie Becker-Phelps, PhD responded:
Knowing what feels good and what turns you on is essential. If you know this, then make sure that you communicate it to him (during sex and at other times). See if the two of you can actively work together to make this a wonderful experience for both of you.

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Dr. Becker-Phelps is a well-respected psychologist, who is dedicated to helping people understand themselves and what they need to do to become emotio...More

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