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Sometimes a hug would feel nice
rabeater posted:
I was diagnosed with RA five years ago. I take enbrel along with methotrexate and some days would just love someone to ask how I am feeling. I am a school teacher, mom, and wife too. My days are so busy and there are nights I just collapse from exhaustion. My family has never asked how I am feeling and that hurts. Anyways, there needs to be more said about RA so that others know how sad it can make us all feel at times. I am sending warm thoughts to all others this holiday season. Maybe Santa will give everyone around us a bit more compassion.
Ramona614 responded:
l am giving you a hug. lts hard to deal with something other people dont understand.
lcover responded:
Just know that some of us can relate with you and I'm sorry about your pain.

rayln2010 responded:
was wondering how does that embril effect your daily activities? my doctor is starting me on that in janurary as i am also on methotrexate 6 a week and its not working with the prednisone. and my family never asks me how im feeling either my co workers ask more often and thats sad. im a chef and a wife and i can relate to how you are feeling. please let me know how that med works for you.
raJack responded:
{{{{{{{{{{{{{{BIG HUG}}}}}}}}}}}}}
I am always asked, I wish that they would not ask, because I always lie, and say I am doing OK. Don't want then to worry, I am sure though they can see it in my face. Best wishes back to you...
Be where your feet are, and remember to breath!
Stephen91455 replied to rayln2010's response:
Hi Rayln

I've been on Enbrel since June without any problem although this last month it doesn;t seem to be working as well as when I started it. My Rheumy just increased my methotrexate from 8 to 10 and I'm still on prednisone. She also put me on pain pills which seem to help. My mother had RA so my siblings always ask how I'm doing, but friends don't understand what we going through. Props to your co-workers. If you need another friend that really cares I'm breakrun1955@yahoo dot com
bubbemomma responded:
am also in education and have RA. i know exactly what you mean when you say you just collapse in evenings. besides working my job full time and being a wife, i have trained 2 dogs 3 nights a week for 8 years, swim, and in the past 2 years have incorporated yoga into my routine. i had to stop and say NO to some activities so i didn't crash and burn causing a flare up. i have given up most of the dog training and showing of the dogs. i continue to move with swimming, walking, and yoga finding a balance in what i do each day. i have explained some things to my family about how i feel and how life impacts me differently every day. they are more understanding. i have also had to share some of this information with people who work with me. they are beginning to understand. i think RA needs a spokes person. phil mickelson, pro golfer, has been speaking out about his arthritis. i am not sure if it is RA, but we definitely need more people speaking out. stay focused on your needs! put some things on the side. people will have to understand.
Gjarb responded:
I am with you and for you. I have RA and Lupus. My immediate staff often inquire about how I am feeling and have empathy for my health issues. Like you, I have exhausting evenings, and it takes all my strength to get home to 'crash and burn'. No one in my home asks how am I feeling; how was your day; is there anything I can get for you; allow me to take that upstairs for you; can I put that in the trunk for you, or wherever. Nothing. And like you said: it hurts. Particularly, when it is obvious that you are struggling with something to lift or carry - offering to assist without having to ask is just as good as physical HUG! Hugs? What is that?! Do they still make those? Until they are actually inside our bodies, they have no idea what we're dealing with. Hang in there - everyone with these unsympathetic situations.
Dlocke1 responded:
I feel for you so much! Sit the whole family down and explain to them what you are going through. It may or may not hit home at first but keep telling them & tell them when you need help! Get rid of any guilt or shame you feel because those are totally useless emotions. Take care of yourself first or you will not be be able to care for your family!

You are correct in that there needs to be much more info. out there about arthritis, RA, fibromyalgia, lupus, etc. Trying to eat more vegetables, fruits, whole grains, etc. has helped me some! Cut out any processed meat or food! It will make the pain much worse!

Good luck. I definitely feel your pain!
FiftySicks replied to Dlocke1's response:
i totally agree w/ Dlocke1 about sitting the family down and informing them that you need help! My family has been so supportive because I TOLD THEM about how i feel. i also have FIBRO, CHRONIC MIGRAINES, HYPOTHYROIDISM, HERNIATED DISCS IN NECK & BACK, DEPRESSION. FIBRO STARTED first and my Mom was afraid to hug me and i asked her to be careful and then she became afraid to hug me for fear of hurting me. so, i told her to just hug me, and i'd tell her when it was too much. since then, i get gentle, calming hugs from her and everyone in my family.

btw, i'm on SOCIAL SECURITY DISABLILTY, BUT, it took me 7 yrs to get approval!!! if it wasn't for my parents, i'd be a bag lady w/out a home. i'm so happy that my parents helped me through those tough years and now i can start paying them back.

also, i'm 51 and all of this started when i was 40.. and that's my story..

rabeck responded:
was diagnosed with ra six years ago. i am in sales and marketing so hthere is lots of lifting and walking and standing and talking and smiling and smoozing when i just don't feel like it. i've never liked people touching me. i was diagnosed with fibro two years ago. there's lots of hugging and hand shaking in my work. it hurts. i reading everything today, i realize that i'm very fortunate to have a wonderful family that helps me out. my employer allows my husband to come with me to work. he drives me around and sets up my booths when i can't do it. i give my kids my water bottles so they can open it for me. i'm not bragging, i'm just so sorry you don't have that. please try to speak to your family and tell them what you need. you need to make you first. you need to get your rest so you can deal with all the other stuff. i now take a muscle relaxer so i can sleep through the night. that made all the difference. i still have pain and have lots to deal with, but sleeping through the night helps me make it through the day. talk to your doctor about it. i'm sending you a big hug. *HUG* we all send you a *HUG* and want to help you feel better. do you talk to people at your doctor's office? that helped me alot to get ideas. look at the ra foundation website too. *LOVE* *HUG*
achef replied to rabeck's response:
I fell down three months ago injuring my left knee, after suffering sleepless nights, the xray, mri shows a bruised knee with fluid is causing all this horrible pain. Pain meds don't help and I just dont know what to do, how long does it take for an inside bruise to heal, I can hardly walk and nothing helps but a HUG. Anyone experienced this or have any suggestions?
Caprice_WebMD_Staff replied to achef's response:
Hi Achef and welcome to WebMD,

I encourage you to start a new discussion about this on our Pain Management community .

To do that, once you're there, hold your cursor over the orange Post Now button on the upper right and choose 'Discussion' from the drop down menu which appears. Fill in the subject line and body of the message (you can ignore the poll part if you want) and Submit.
We must let go of the life we have planned, so as to accept the one that is waiting for us. ~Joseph Campbell
pugsforever responded:

I have had RA for about 10yrs. now and I know how you are feeling. People look at you and think your okay but they have
no clue how you are feeling inside. Yes it can be very
depressing. I was on Humira for about one year and that is
not working so my Dr. wants me to go on Orencia. I am kinda
depressed that the Humira stopped working already.

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