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It's been suggested that we leave a space between the start of a post and the triggering part.

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first post of 2011 sad :-(
bod27 posted:
hey everyone

greetings for 2011 and lets hope we all have a better, safer year.

I have been trying to get my head into doing my tax return today - and have failed miserably. :-( but then numbers have never been my strong point.

I have been wanting to post for ages about all the urges and triggers that have been around me. I am hurting right now and don't know what to do. I am nearly at the end of my DBT group course and I think that is panic-ing me slightly as well.

I feel cut off and trying not to drown. I have to go to work in a bit but just want to hide in bed.

not even sure if I can write what I want to say but thought this would be a good start. so many things I want to do and so many things I want to cry/scream about. I know I am stronger than I was but I'm not better. I don't want to have to pretend that I am. everyone thinks I am doing so much better. just want to hide away and not exist

got to get my arse into gear and get ready to walk to work - in a pub I don't like, with customers who I don't really like - its soul destroying but it's a job so I shouldn't complain. Found out before christmas that rumors have been spread that I was sacked from my old job for stealing from the till - which is TOTALLY untrue. In my mind this is slander and I am very angry about it. prob not helping my general mood if I think about it.

Will try and take down some of my defences and talk some more later but got to go now

((((((((((((((all of you))))))))))))
Caprice_WebMD_Staff responded:
I am so sorry about that rumor! :-( Hate garbage like that.

You and me both being not good with numbers. And hey, you're early with even thinking about doing your taxes so please don't be too hard on yourself.

Thanks for checking in... I've been wondering how you're doing. I know others will be chiming in soon but until then.... (((hugs)))
We never touch people so lightly that we do not leave a trace. ~Peggy Tabor Millin
slik_kitty responded:
people can be so mean sometimes. so sorry people are saying those things about you. i totally hear you on the job. i'm soooo not happy in my job, but at least i have a job. so many others don't, so i stay where i am. at least i have the most awesome boss in the world. he he he
bod27 replied to slik_kitty's response:
Thanks for responding guys

I spent the half hour walk to work doing big number x tables in my head (some of my numbers were 3.5, 17, 28, 243 etc) It def helped the urges to diminish for a time - my head was far too crowded with numbers to have any space for anything else. lol

Caprice - not early with my taxes at all. they have to be in by the end of the month - I have had since April to do them - why I always leave them I will never know. oh yeah probably cause I hate doing them hehe
Headline replied to bod27's response:
(((H))) I'm sorry you're struggling so much.

People really are awful sometimes. It's so painful to be the target of rumors - especially because it's beyond your control to make cruel people become kind. The people who matter either already know the truth, or will be willing to hear the truth.

Are there any options available for help with your taxes? A professional preparer with reasonable fees? A friend or loved one who's good with numbers?
Success is peace of mind, which is a direct result of self-satisfaction in knowing you made the effort to become the best of which you are capable. -- Coach John Wooden (1910-2010)
ZeldaAlone responded:

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