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    Help Can i get through this TRIGGER
    leanie98 posted:
    I need some help with that i am going through.My husband and i are parting ways.Dont know for sure when exactly.There are many things to go through and many things to do before we venture into this.My son has an anxiety disorder and is having a hard time with this .He has a hard time with daily but this is going to be a big one.I know that he blames it on me,the splitting up.In the long run i dont know who is going to stay with me or his dad.We want him to finish out the school year here.His father and have been staying toether for money reasons and because of my son We did not want to have to go through parents splitting up.He was and is our main concern .He has been acting out a lot and especially at me.
    I have been feeling like not being here at all and just disappearing all together then I wont have to be trouble for anyone .This whole things hurts so much.Especially when it comes to my son.He is my life What a life without him .Then i dont know what i am or going to be able to do this alone emotionally or physically because of a few medical issues. I just want to self harm so much and it is killing me I have not seen my therapist for while cuz of her medical issues I do see her in a week .She said that if i do self harm and i end up int the hospital they probably would not let me have my son.She said that she has seen that happen.She is letting me know things right now so i dont lose my son if he does decide to stay with me.I dont think in the long run that he is staying with me but I have to maintain myself.We ,his dad and i,are going to try and talk things out again and she is we can put up with things that we cant live with one another for .I know there are things that i dont think that i can put up with at all and i am sure that he has plenty too.I am just so frustrated and have alot of anger and no where to put it all.His dad does not treat me well i dont think.He thinks that he does I dont know what land he is coming from His own little world.He has never hit me so that is not one of the problems so i just want people to know that .I keep hearing that i am the problem i swear like he is the angel.I mean he does know that he does somethings but it seems that i am the source of the problems He also says things in front of my son that he should not say and my son should not know It is adult stuff and he is only 12 Well thanks for listening to this long winded post .It must have taken your breath away by now .
    hope everyone is well and stay safe hugs leanie
    slik_kitty responded:
    hugs leanie. i wish i lived closer so i could help you, but i'm not leaving my mtns, so you have to move out here. he he he
    Off_The_Wall responded:
    I know that must be so tough. I am so sorry. I admire you for hanging in there and doing what you're capable of doing to keep your son. By the way, I don't think a 12 year old should have a say in who he lives with. That's an adult decision in my opinion. Definitely would be best if he could spend time with both parents. I know it hurts you that he's upset with you right now, but try to remember that it is also the age. I taught 6th grade for six years and I can tell you the majority of kids get angry with their parents at that age. Just keep on loving him and one day he will grow up and get past this. (((Hugs)))
    lostkate responded:
    I recently parted ways with my husband. I have two kids, 19,14. My kids are everything to me. I too feel like disappearing. Im sorry you have to go through this. ((((hugs)))
    leanie98 replied to lostkate's response:
    I want to thank you for your responses.It helps a lot to have others input.I do know that at the teen years the kids are angry at the parents for a lot of things .My son is the most angry at me . lostkate I know how that feels that your kids are your everything.yes i do feel like disappearing but we all know that we have to stay for our kids and we dont want to hurt them in any if we can help it.I am sorry that you had to go through it also It is not easy at all.I hope that you have a therapist and some supports that in place so that if you need help you can get it .
    Kitty I know that you wish that you could help me but i dont want to leave here to the mountains.It is hard when you have lived somewhere for so many years .

    leanie hugs

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