Self Harm Community

My name is Paja, I have lived with SIV (self inflicted violence) for 43 years. I have DID (dissositive identity order) but usually Its me who posts, my alters are good at signing there name if they want to speak up.

I am a mother of two kids 10 and 5. I am the wife of a kind, gentleman for 12 years. I have work in a nursing home for 29 years.

I am not normal, nor would ever attempt to be. I am me, An olive wearing nutty weirdo who makes life interesting.

I am a writer. I love pigs. I love to play games with my family. Yup I'm a total geeky-dweeb.

I tool up SIV to deal with the sexual abuse in my childhood. Years of therapy in my 20's saved my life and helped me to get control of the SIV. I can go extended periods with no injuring, but I can't seem to eliminate it entirely from my life.

I take it one injury at a time. Some I can avoid, others I can't and at those times I support myself with compassion and comfort and get back to living.

Been here on this board so long I am like a mold WebMD can't get rid of.

Glad everyone finds there way here and I hope it helps them as much as it helps me.

Peace be the journey

Paja

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I've been harming myself since as far back as I can remember, though cutting myself since I was about 12. I have tried therapy and medication many times but I just can't tolerate it (therapy because it makes me worse, medication does help me but I end up refusing to take it because I believe it will kill me).

I don't want to talk about my childhood, but it wasn't good.

I have a daughter who is 1 1/2 years old who lights up my life. Sometimes I even post pics of her here because I'm so proud of her.

I haven't really announced this publicly yet so here it is: I'm pregnant with our second who is due the first week of December. I'll be having a repeat c-section so the baby might arrive either the first week of December or the last week of November (or whenever God wants the baby here!)

I have been married for almost 8 years to my best friend.

I too have been on this message board for what seems like forever. I guess at least 10 years or so, I really don't remember.

I'm Caprice and I have worked for WebMD since 2001 and was part of creating this community (and the Sexual Abuse one) so many years ago. So I've been here since forever too.

I had my own battle with self injury for quite a few years but have been free of it for decades now.

I live in beautiful British Columbia.

Welcome to all of you who are new to this community!

Hi, all, I'm Lovely Lemon Tree, aka LLT. I've been kicking around these parts for years and years, I think I first came here in '03.

I've been dealing with various forms of SH since I was about 10 and in fourth grade. I found all kinds of ways to harm. The one I can control the least is the hair pulling. I do it every day, all the time. I don't know who loses more hair -- my very furry longhaired cat, Savannah, or me.

Savannah (Savvy), my pride and joy, is an-almost-three-year old gray and white Maine Coon cat. She goes where I go -- she is my service animal. Although she's been snarly these last few days, she's usually very amenable to going new places with me, as long as she has her carrier and can sit in it when she wants. Savvy and I live on the coast of Maine, where it's currently so cool and rainy that my heater has kicked on.

I am currently looking for a low-impact job to supplement my Disability payments (disability is psychiatric... my whole host of symptoms doesn't make my med management or therapy easy). I see my therapist, Lynn, twice a week, and have med management in a large town up the road. I'm also finishing up a 90-hour course to become a certified peer support specialist. Maybe I can combine that training with a job? Hm, a question for the voc rehab people I see on Friday.

Welcome to those I haven't spoken to yet. And hello to everyone. I may be here more often now, I'm not sure.

Peace and long life.

My name is Jessica and I live in Milwaukee, WI. I have one daughter named Alexis but we call her Lexi. She is seven years old and will be eight in August.

I have been on and off the message boards for only a year and a half maybe. I am not sure.

I have been self injuring since I was 17 years old. I am 34 now so that is a long time. There have been times in my life when I have not injured for a good amount of time. But I always end up back at the self injuring when I am feeling very stressed or overwhelmed.

I have been diagnosed as bipolar and as having borderline personality disorder. At times I feel pretty normal and function normally as well. But when I am not functioning well, eveything in my life is affected. I always take my meds so I don't understand why I go back and forth with my moods. I have not gone off of my meds at all since I began taking them way back when I first started taking medication.

Hey there! I'm B. I've only been on the board for a couple of months. I'm 37 yrs old & I have 2 wonderful boys (17 & and my sweet terrier mix, Lucy.

I have PTSD due to a rape at 15 and another rape at 35. I also have epilepsy, anxiety, and an eating disorder. I don't see a therapist...I'm on the fence with that one right now. I've been SH'ing since Jr. High. I have been able to go years without doing it, but it's come back full force since my mother passed away in 2009. I actively cut, but recently told my amazing boyfriend about it & he is helping me work through some things.

I work in a hospital laboratory. Sometimes I love my job, sometimes I don't. But, there is very rarely a dull moment. You must have a strong stomach & warped sense of humor to be a lab rat.

I love music. I love to write. I love the rain. But I think that sitting on my covered balcony drinking an iced mocha is my favorite activity. I'm a slave to a good coffee.

I haven't been around much the last few weeks. I damaged myself pretty good, but I've almost healed (on the outside). This board is amazing. Everybody is so caring & kind. I don't know what would have happened on Mother's Day if I hadn't had all of you wonderful ladies to hear me out.

B

Not sure where that strange smiley face came from...but my sons are 17 and 8. And I also forgot to mention that I'm almost 5 years (July) clean from a cocaine habit that almost killed me multiple times.

LLT...I just wanted to say that I lived in Maine when I was married to my first husband (many many moons ago). Oh how I miss the shore...the beautiful season changes (I've never seen a fall so beautiful as what you get in Maine)...and I even miss the fantastic accent spoken only by a true Mainer/Mainiac (no offense...I truly LOVE the accent...but I did have to teach my son how to say the letter 'r' when we moved back west). Oh you have made me so jealous and nostalgic...

Triggery Hello everyone,

For those that don't know me, I am Kate or more specifically Kate_Te, since Lost Kate was here before me. I am 47 years old, I live in upstate NY and have two killer attack cats: Loki & Odin.

I am on Disability for my psychiatric issues: Anxiety/Depression/Social Anxiety/etc....

I've been on this board since February. I am relatively new to SH, tried it as a way to relieve the pressure of my anxiety without attempting suicide.

I am a MTF transsexual who has lived full time as myself for the last 15 years. I am about to start hormone therapy this month (meeting with the doctor on Friday).

I've learned DBT therapy in my numerous hospitalizations in the last 2 years. It really does help me keep my anxiety in check (about 5 out of 7 days/week).

Welcome to all!

Kate_Te

Hi all...I am Kendra (though I will usually just go by "K" here) if I sign my posts at all.

My picture is of my cat, Elliott...who is the ultimate scaredy-cat (the first 6months-1year that I had him, I only saw him when I happened to surprise him when he was out from under the couch)


I have dealt with SI/SH of one sort or another ever since I can remember, although it got significantly more severe about 17-18 years ago after I started being (or at least remember being) sexually abused.

I've been on the board for probably 4 or 5 years (maybe more, I don't remember any more...seems like I've known a lot of people here my whole life) I've gone years at a time without harming, but those stretches have been interspersed with periods of definite struggles (which I am in right now)

Not married...no kids...work and school are my life right now

hi ya'll. I'm fran. i've been married 33 years in august to the same man! i really am very fortunate for that. he is a good man. I have two children both in their late 20's. A daughter and a son.

I've been on the board for a very long time. I've known Paja since she was on here and so I've been one of the oldsters so to speak.

I started sh as a child as well, but it escalated to a much larger scale in my early 30's and has pretty much been constant with a few breaks hear and there. the longest for the last 20 years that I have been able to maintain staying sh free has been 4.5 months.

Welcome if you're a first timer and welcome back if you're a fixture here or coming back from being gone.

Aah, B. Today is one of those summer days on the coast that starts out cold and rainy but winds up with sun and a soft warmth. I'm originally from TX, but I needed something so entirely different, I picked up and moved to Maine in 2007.
My original intention was for me to finish up my MSW here, but the winding road of life takes us (me) in other directions.

I do love it here. I will miss it a lot when I go back home.