Self Harm Community

Oh, B I remember that stress. (((((((((((((((( B ))))))))))))))))))

Get a wet wash cloth and stop for a moment and put it on the back of you neck and close your eyes.

You will get nothing done in this state and it makes everything amplified.

Let the world go on rotating without you for the next hour or so. Get P and head down to the beach. Let the waves lick your feet and wash the stress out of you and back out to sea.

So the house isn't vacuumed for mother in law, its your house and her opinion doesn't matter. So you don't have all the baby stuff organized, you will find you use less stuff the second time around. So the laundry isn't done. Declare it pj day and wear your fuzzy jams and slippers.

Breath dear one. You are going to make it. How is your little ones kidneys doing? any updates?

I made lists so I could see what was so important that it was stressing me out. Then worked slowly through it doing the easy stuff first then ASKING for help with the other things.

Don't feel guilty for asking for help from hubby, he might be working during the day but you are working 24/7 raising his child and growing his next one.

Draw a message in the sand for me.

Peace be the journey

I wish I could just say screw it and head to the beach but I know that would just make things worse. And the problem is I can't even start on the 10 million things I need to get done because P is napping and our house is tiny so if I do anything it will wake her up. So all I can do is sit here and freak out about it. I tried making a list and got even more overwhelmed. In answer to you question, I have another ultrasound scheduled in a couple of weeks to check on the baby's kidney. Thank you for caring.

OTW -
I hope things have calmed down a little for you. I understand where you were at, I have trouble taking a minute to calm down when I get worked up as well.
Hugs for you & prayers for your baby's kidney!
Kate_Te

One of the best things I was ever taught even before i entered into therapy was to deep breathe deep from my lower belly and hold it for a second after drawing it all in and letting it out ever so slowly and doing this until i calmed down.

When P is napping you can do this and practice makes perfect!

Ya know who taught me this breathing skill? My allergist! I had developed a life threatening allergy and it 4 x's almost tookmy life. Of course he instructed me that if you are having an allergy attack do not breathe like I have just suggested you try.

boy do i know how it feels to be you! as long as the toilets are clean and the wash basins clean don't worry about it.
ya know i used to keep a spotless house! SPOTLESS! EVEN WITH 2 LITTLE KIDS, RUNNING A BUSINESS AND ALL THE NEIGHBOORHOOD KIDS IN MY BASEMENT.
I used to get so nervous in the morning i would puke all morning long. Don't you see ????????????????? doesn't your instinct from being on here all these years now tell you something different????????????? Please OTW take care of YOU, baby unnamed and P. That's a lot!

trust me when i say it really won't matter 20 years from now. It won't matter even 10 years from not and not 5 either!
Let her judge Lest she be judged! I know logically you get this.......Its just the emoitonal piece that gets in the way.

So take that emotional piece and the logical piece and put them together like reeses pieces just for one small thing and what do you get? apply and disperse.

I used to have so many panic attacks and anxiety attacks
remind yourself you are safe you are ok. I B am safe and I will be OK! say that to yourself.

You are such a good person...........I hate to see one evil person destroy you and you stand defenseless. You aren't you know. You just feel that way. Our thoughts make what happens to us...............try one positive affirmation like i wrote above and do the breathing every time P takes a nap.

I'm sending prayers for you baby and P. God speed. bb

Thank you BB. I am trying to take your advice and deep breath when I'm feeling overwhelmed. I know it won't matter years from now.... hell, it won't even matter a couple of weeks from now.... but right now getting the cleaning, cooking, and everything else done feels important. It's just all that work, on top of the stress of who it is that's coming to visit, on top of being 8 months pregnant and taking care of a toddler..... well, it's just a lot! And I don't handle stress well, at all.

I know its EXTREMELY STRESSFUL! i REALLY DO GET IT!
If you can just like dogdancing said make a list and then just work a half hour at a time! Then when P takes a nap practice and relax with the deep breathing and maybe envisioning in your mind a really safe quiet place that you are in. If you can do this at break time it really will help.

When I'm stressed like you are right now and tired and pregnant (not horrors for me!) I work 20 or 30 mins. and take 10 or 15 mins. off. It really does help and you'd be surprised how much you get done.

You are not out to impress her are ya? cuz who cares about that! Do whats important for you! Gawddddddddddd you're 8 mos. pregnant!

You don't need all this stress. With the past pains, the kidney problem............the baby needs you mama. Do whats right for you! Ever heard of SANDWICHES!
AND I'M SURE YOU'RE HOUSE IS CLEAN ENOUGH!

I really do hope you make you the baby and P your priority not your MIL!

OTW,

Stress is not what you need at the moment. If I could, I would help you out so all you would need to do would be relax.

Hugs,
Bonnie

So upset and triggered right now. And I just tried to post on here and when I hit submit it told me WebMD wasn't available so I guess it ate my post. So I can't even be heard here. Crying. Going to SH.

like bommie said you need to relax./ that happened to me three times today. its not you/

OTW -

It's been a few hours now, how are you doing? Hopefully you have gotten P down to bed and are relaxing a little with hubby.

Speaking of hubby can he help out by cleaning some? After all it is his mother & you are carrying his baby. Just a thought.

(((OTW)))

Well P is in her crib but she might have trouble sleeping because the a-hole neighbor is running an electric saw and hammering in their kitchen, which is only feet from P's room. We have had this problem with the neighbor continuing to work late into the night, waking P up over and over for the past 2 weeks. When husband goes and talks to them, they are rude to him and don't stop until he threatens to call the police. We finally did call the police last week because it was after 11 and we had already talked to them about it. So then they went and told all our neighbors that we called the cops on them because they were working past 8 p.m. Anyway, of all nights I can't handle them waking P up. She doesn't need to be lacking sleep and cranky with visitors coming. Plus I think she may be running a fever and I am in pain with cramps right now. If they wake her up I am going to go absolutely insane. I think the work is finally done for the night but I can't relax. All I can do is sit and listen to that electric saw and hammering and feel like I'm going to lose it.

Didn't mean to post that as anonymous.

not to worry you know how it gets around hereplease let you and the baby get rest

O DAMN IT! I LOST MY POST. CAN'T REWRITE TO TIRED. BUT DID WANT TO TELL YOU I WAS MAKING A FUNNY ABOUT MY A HOW NEIOGHBOOR AND TRYING TO GET YOU SMILE. SO KNOW IT WAS FUNNY AND TRY TO PURK UP THOSE PRETTY LIPS OF YOURS.
I AM OFF TO BED REAL SOON AND AM GOING TO SEND AS MUCH OF MY LEFT ENERGY TO YOU AND DEM FOR TONIGHT. I AM GOING TO SAY STRONG PRAYERS FOR BOTH OF YOU AND EVERYONE ELSE HERE, BUT PARTICULARLY YOU TWO! GOD SPEED.