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bubbles_bobble posted:
[TRIGGER] I HAVE BEEN PARANOID ALL DAY NERVOUS ANZXIOUS
I HAVE BURNED SEVERLY AND I WILL NOT GO TO A DOCTOR
I HAVE QUIT THERAPY EXCEPT TO SEE THE NEW PDOC I WILL SEE NOV 8TH MY BIL BIRTHDAY YUK THIS IS A BAD OMEN
I DON'T CARE ANYMORE AT ALL MY HUSBAND WANTS TO ARGUE WITH ME HE'S MUNCHING ON HIS FRIGGING CHIPS WHICH MAKES ME EVEN MORE NERVOUS HE DRIVES ME NUTS EVERY SINGLE NIGHT MUNCH MUNCH MUNCH AND THEN HE EATS LIKE A STUPID BIRD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I AM SO AGGRAVATED I'VE GOT TO GO SH SOME MORE
One day at a time
Reply
 
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soulkeepers responded:
BB,


I hate reading the pain that you're in and wish it was something I could do.I wish I could hold your pain for you cause there's been alot of hurting going on for far too long.


Paranoia has me awake to so I know the feeling of being jumpy.Would listening to your ipod help ease those overriding thoughts or ease the urge?....Anything that doesn't involve anymore pain.

I'm crying for you and just want you to be safe.
WHEN EVIL PREVAILS GOOD WILL DO NOTHING
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to soulkeepers's response:
[TRIGGER] I'VE SEEN YOU HERE SOULKEEPERS WHO AREYOU?
ARE YOU DEM? DON'T CRY FOR ME BECAUSE IT IS A WASTE OF TIME. I'VE BEEN SELF HARMING MOST OF MY LIFE AND IT JUST SEEMS LIKE IT WON'T EVER GO AWAY.
ITS HARD HARD HARD WHEN YOU HAVE TO RUN A BUSINESS AND THE LIVELIYHOOD IS ON YOUR SHOULDERS TO MAKE ENOUGH CALLS TO MAKE ENOUGH WORK. ITS REALLY REALLY TOUGH. I'M A HIGH FUNCTIONING IDIOT IS WHAT I AM REALLY!@X1KSKD .

THATS NOT A REAL ANYTHING THAT I TYPED I JUSTE TYPED A BUNCH OF LETTERS THEY DON'T MEAN A SITE ATALL.

I WONT WRITE ANYMORE BECAUSE I DON'T WANT YOU TO DISTRESS. I'M SORRY I DID NOT MEAN TO UPSET YOU.
I FEEL BADLY. I JUST DON'T HAVE ANYWHERE ELSE TO GO CUZ I QUIT THERPY TODAY COMPLETELY AND I TOLD THEM NOT TO WRITE ME OR CALL ME. WELL THATS ALL I GOT
One day at a time
 
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soulkeepers replied to bubbles_bobble's response:
BB,


I'll make you this promise right that I'm not Dem.It's not a waste of time to cry for someone when they are hurting.It releases stress besides I mainly was crying for myself .I was already tearful cause of something else that happened.There's no switch that people can hit so that can't feel for others.It's just not that simple and you know you can always come here.


I know how hard it is not to give on when you want to SH,I've been doing since 12.Know how it feels to want to stop but can't once you start and it's a everyday battle.You have a lot to deal with which the pressure can feel like you'll being suffocated.What can you do to help pull you out this spot?..Even if it's only for five or ten minutes so you can catch your breath.

I really resent that comment and you're not an idiotYou didn't upset me at all so I don't want to feel that feel.Now if you stop writing here then for sure I will be stressing.With all that you deal with you are still here reaching out to others.I just don't like to see other people in deep like the ones here and don't deserve to be.


Let me tell you something else everything that you write here means alot.You are someone that so many draws strength from and the words spoken here carriers a lot of weight behind them.Every word means something to someone believe that.Especially for someone like me that don't have no one talk to them and not at them (other than their doctors) .Ohters know and feel my pain too cause they are hurting the same way.


OK what can we do about the therapy situation?...Can the that caused you to stop be worked out or would you be comfortable with someone else?I hope you can get some sleep and wake up refresh to start your day with less pain.


I'm gonna pray for you before going to bed,GOD I don't know when last prayed.
WHEN EVIL PREVAILS GOOD WILL DO NOTHING
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to soulkeepers's response:
[TRIGGER] SK
I'm glad that you prayed and it makes me cry too. Can you pray for you too? I need so badly to go to my aa meeting but now i have a delivery coming at the time that the delivery usually shows up.
i'm struggling with not drinking as well. recovering aa/r and will have another 30 days on tomorrow if i make it.
i'm so depressed and having your husband scream at you because the last two women didn't fit in is just not real fun. however my last pdoc whom i just saw on the 25th and my employee called me then and that's when i got mad at her! told me in an email last night i was not out of line so i read it to husband and he said later in the evening yeah she wasn't a fit!

REALLY????????? NOT A FIT??????? YA THINK? AND THEN THERE WAS THE BIPOLAR WHO WHEN YOUR DEPRESSED IS EVEN MORE ANNOYING SHE WAS ALWAYS HYPOMANIC BUT LOUD O MG...........NOT THAT I CAN'T BE THAT WAY BUT SINCE I'M MEDICATED I'M NOT VERY OFTEN ANYMORE ANYWAYS. I ASKED HER TO USE HER INSIDE VOICE AND SHE GOT P/OD.
IT WAS VERY GRACIOUS OF YOU FOR WHAT YOU WROTE BUT I GIVE ..........I DON'T WANT TO GO BACK TO THERAPY UNLESS ITS MANDATED THEN I'LL HAVE TO GO BUT I'M NOT TALKIN.
THANK YOU AND TAKE CARE OF YOU. GOD BLESS
P.S. HAVE WE MET BEFORE UNDER DIFFERENT NAMES
One day at a time
 
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MandyCake replied to bubbles_bobble's response:
BB,

Wow... Soulkeepers's hit the nail on the head with what was written. That is powerful and I second these thoughts.

Can you and your husband find someone who is neutral to you both that you can talk with? Communication is a tricky thing... Sometimes what we hear is not what the other person means and sometimes it may be that what is said needs to be restructered... You have an illness... just like anyone with COPD, Diabetis, etc... Your husband needs to be educated to this and to know what you need in order for him to help you. Do up a list of how he can help you in times of need. "an ounce of prevention..." Example: When I am feeling overwhelmed I need you to.......... Is this something you are willing to consider trying?

My sweet BB, also if you can... call a CVOEO office and ask for an appointment for you and your husband to discuss business statagies. This business is eating you up, litterally... professional help with an unbiased view can help you and hubby restructure and organize and get the help you both need so that the business which helps sustain your life doesn't become life that just sustains the business... (make sense?)

I love you BB... Please treat your burns, get some rest, breathe deep. There is hope. There is help... sometimes we just need others to show us this...

Gra'
Bonnie
If I could have one day and have that day be very windy and choose what I wished to be... I'd be a Kite and fly free...

In Harmony,
Bonnie
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to MandyCake's response:
what the hell is a cvoeo office
don't love me i'm unloveab le i'm ugly i'm hideous as the joke goes
but i am the joke
One day at a time
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to bubbles_bobble's response:
[TRIGGER] SOULKEEPERS
YOU AROUND? WHO ARE YOU? I KNOW I KNOW YOU BUT ....
PLEASE CONTACT ME. I DON'T KNOW HOW MUCH LONGER I CAN HANG ON. CAN'T CALL CRISIS. GONNA GO BED CUZ I'M SO TIRED I CAN HARDLY KEEP MY EYES OPEN SO THAT IS GOOD I GUESS.
One day at a time
 
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soulkeepers replied to bubbles_bobble's response:
BB,



WHAT'S UP?
WHEN EVIL PREVAILS GOOD WILL DO NOTHING
 
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friedeggs replied to soulkeepers's response:
am sorry if i hurt any one here/ i love you guys with all my heat. but my life has been miserable for all these weeks and about to get worse in the next two. i just wanted to take a step back so i would not hurt my family and do mean that they are not just words. instead have you all mad at ne. iu am so sorry
My family tree must have been an oak because all my relatives are nuts.
 
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off_the_wall replied to friedeggs's response:
I don't know of anyone here that you have hurt or who is mad at you. In very sorry things have been so rough for you. Maybe things won't get worse, you never know. Try to think positive and positive things might just happen. (((Dem)))
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to off_the_wall's response:
((((DEM)))) no one is mad at you. you always think that and you're always corrected that nobody is mad. did yo usign the pact that if anyone has an issue we will talk about it? I wrote it up you'll have to go back and read it and sign it.

OTW is right try some positive thoughts
One day at a time
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to soulkeepers's response:
hi soulkeepers
since i wrote tha t post i am feeling better. but yo udid not answer my questions if i know you? r you someone under a different name.
i want to thank you very much for helping me. between all the support here and my t i'm working at it and feeling better.
i'm most glad about that!

i hope yo uhave a good weekend!
One day at a time
 
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soulkeepers replied to bubbles_bobble's response:
BB,


The answer to both of your questions is no


Unless I'm a nut that fell from a tree near you or your surrounding.
WHEN EVIL PREVAILS GOOD WILL DO NOTHING
 
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MandyCake replied to bubbles_bobble's response:
BB,

You are extremely loveable. Hey, nuts of the same tree, we all hang together! No squirell is going to seperate us! If you are a joke, so am I... We can wait for the punch line together, deal?

A cvoeo office is a community vocational office of economic options. Instead of Department of Social Services or Department of Families, etc... cvoeo, is a seperate entity that can offer assists from vouchers to buy furniture/clothing, money to pay rent, utilities, phone and $60 for whatever, farmer market coupon books with a $30 value, and even deposit and first months rent on an apartment.

I have missed you my bubbles_bobble...

Gra'
Bonnie
I have acheived my dream of being a kyte, for a single day, riding the wind. The anchors that held me down lifted... I was set free.. Now my journey of healing is possible. Gra' Bonnie


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