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It's hard having a baby
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off_the_wall posted:
Okay, I know I am super blessed by my new little girl but dang am I hurting! It's been almost 2 weeks since I've had her and the pain is still so bad. I haven't been able to post a pic here yet because I can't sit at the computer long enough to get a picture uploaded and posted. It's lucky my phone will let me post now from bed.

My incision is infected, my blood pressure is still too high, I'm still in lots of pain... Taking 4 prescription meds and they leave me feeling so sick and also give me a headache. E is great at breastfeeding, for that I am very lucky, but she has me up all night long because she wants to nurse around the clock. So I am deliriously tired.

Took E in for an ultrasound this morning and her kidneys are still enlarged. We see her pediatrician tomorrow and he will let us know what (if anything) will be done about them.

Will see my dr again on Friday about my infection that doesn't seem to be improving.

And the post-pardum hormones- OMG I can not stop crying! Going to be really bad next week when my husband goes back to work and I am left here still recovering from surgery but expected to care for 2 little ones! God help me because I don't know how I'm going to manage it but husband is out of vacation days after this week.

Anyway, I just needed to vent and could really use any support anyone can provide for me right now. Thanks!
Reply
 
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Kate_Te responded:
OTW -
I am sorry you are suffering. My best friend had a c-section & it took her a month to recover & it wasn't even infected. I spent a lot of time over there that month helping where I could. Do you have someone like that in your life, a friend who could come over and make dinner for you or vaccum the house, just some of the little things to make your life a little easier?
I am praying for you and your daughters!
Big hugs!!!
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to Kate_Te's response:
I SWEAR TO GOD OTW IF I DIDN'T HAVE SHINGLES I'D FIND WHERE YOU LIVED AND COME AND HELP YOU!
MY FIRST CHILD A GIRL WAS A C SECTION AND SO I FEEL FOR YOU I WENT THRU HELL TOO! DIDN'T GET INFECTED BUT IT TOOK A LONG TIME FOR ME TO GET BACK AT IT. LUCKILY WE WERE DOING NEW CONSTRUCTION AND I DIDN'T HAVE TO GO BACK TO WORK RIGHT AWAY. KEEP YOUR BABIES WITH YOU AND SLEEP DURING THE DAY WITH THEM. HAVE P (CAN SHE REACH A DOOR KNOB?) STAY IN THE ROOM WIHT YOU WHEN YOU NURSE DURING THE DAY. AND HAVE NAP TIME TOGETHER. TELL P MOMMY IS SICK BECAUSE I CAUGHT A BUG BUT YOU WON'T CATCH MY BUG P BECAUSE ITS ONLY AN ADULT BUG. (GERM WHATEVER YOU HAVE NAMED THIS STUFF WHEN YA'LL GET SICK) SHE CAN COMPREHEND THAT AND THAT;S ALL SHE NEEDS TO COMPREHEND AT 2.

YOUR HUSBAND IS GOING TO HAVE TO STEP UP TO THE PLATE AND COOK DINNER AND HAVE A LUNCH MADE FOR P AND YOU! IT;S NECESSARY. YOU DON'T WANT TO GO SEPTIC! THIS IS A TIME B THAT YOU HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF YOU FIRST SO YOU CAN PUT THE OXYGEN MASK ON THE OTHER 3 OF THEM. HUBBY WILL STAND BY YOU I KNOW IT. HE'S PART OF THE FAMILY AND DON'T GIVE ME ANY CRAP ABOUT HOW HE HAS TO WORK. WHAT DO YOU THINK YOU'RE DOING ALL DAY AND ALL NIGHT????????????????

AND LET IT CRY GIRL ITS OK! BUT YOU NEED TO KEEP VENTING IF IT HELPS. IF IT DOESN'T HELP THEN DON'T BUT WE'VE BEEN WORRIED ABOUT YOU AND I'M VERY GLAD YOU WROTE.

MY MOM DID COME AND DO LAUNDRY AND SAID GO TAKE A NAP BUT I COULD NEVER SLEEP DURING THE DAY AND I WAS SLEEP DEPRIVED LIKE YOU. MY DAUGHTER LARA NEVER SLEPT DURING THE NIGHT AND WHILE SHE WAS 7 12 LBS SHE WOULD NURSE FOR A COUPLE OF NANO SECONDS AND FALL ASLEEP. I WOULD TICKLE HER WASH HER FACE WITH COOL WATER AND HER FEET AND NOTHING THE DOCS SAID WORKED. THE GOOD NEWS IS THO SHE IS 30 AND A GOOD GIRL. ONLY HAD ONE MAN IN HER LIFE SO FAR THO I THINK SHE'S ABOUT READY TO DIVORCE HIM. HMMMMMM GUESS THAT'S WHY SHE'S LIVING AT MY HOUSE RIGHT NOW.

ANYWAY SORRY RAMBLINE.... I KNOW ITS HARD BUT ASK YOUR PEDITRICIAN IF YOU'RE FEEDING HER TO OFTEN? THAT COULD BE NOT GOOD FOR HER. I KNOW WHAT YOU WENT THRU WITH P AND ITS NOT GOT TO BE THIS WAY. I KNOW YOUR IN PAIN AND ARE CRYING. ME TOO I'M LOCKED IN MY ROOM RIGHT NOW AND DON'T PLAN ON COMING OUT FOR DINNER COOKING DINNER OR SOCIALIZING WIHT MY DAUGHTER OR HUSBAND AND HE CAME IN MY ROOM AND STUNK SO BAD I HAD TO SPRAY PERFUM!

YOU ARE BEING A GOOD MOM. YOU HAVE TO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF RIGHT NOW AND DO THE BEST WITH P THAT YOU CAN. HAVE HER COLOR AND MARK EACH PAPER THE COLORS YOU WANT HER TO COLOR WITH AND THAT WILL KEEP HER BUSY MATCHING AND COLORING FOR A BIT WHILE YOU GET SOME AT LEAST REST. PLEASE PUMP SOME BREAST MILK FOR BABY AND LET DADDY FEED HER AND GET HER USED TO A NIPPLE. ONE FEEDING A NIGHT IS NOT TO MUCH TO ASK. AFTER ALL YOU HAD THIS BABY TOGETHER RIGHT? AND YOU BOTH ARE WORKING DURING THE DAY SO HE NEEDS TO CONTRIBUTE AT NIGHT TOO.

I KNOW HE WILL YOU NEED TO ASK OK?

AS FOR HELP WHAT HAPPEN TO FAMILY? CAN YOU ASK ONE OF THEM TO COME BACK? AND I LIKE KATE TE IDEA DO YOU HAVE ONE FRIEND WHO COULD COME AND HELP YOU TILL YOU GET ON YOUR FEET.

YOU WON'T KNOW IF YOU HAVE A FRIEND TILL YOU ASK FOR HELP. EVEN IF ITS SOMEONE FROM A CHURCH. OR ASK AT THE HOSPITAL IF THERE ARE ANY VOLUNTEERS IN THE NURSERY WHO WOULD LIKE TO VOLUNTEER AND HELP YOU. IF THERE THRU A HOSPITAL THEY'D BE CHECKED OUT AND CLEARED SECURTIY WISE. SO YOU'D BE SAFE AND SO WOOD THE BABES.

OTW I'M REALLY REACHING OUT TO YOU TO TAKE CARE OF YOU. I'M STRUGGLING WITH EVEN BEING HERE AND HERE YOU BROUGHT TWO BEAUTIFUL LIL GIRLS INTO THE WORLD. YOU NEED HELP WOMAN. SEEK IT PLEASE. I LOVE YOU OTW AND I DON'T PUSH THOSE WORDS AROUND EASILY. DO TAKE CARE
One day at a time
 
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off_the_wall replied to Kate_Te's response:
Thank you, Kate_Te! I was lucky to have had my mom and MIL here to help with everything last week but they live 5 hours away and left on Sunday. And this week I'm lucky to have my husband here. But next week there's no one. No friends to help or anything. All I can figure is that somehow I'll have to fight through the pain because my girls need me and I have no other choice. Doesn't mean I won't cry all week though.
 
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off_the_wall replied to bubbles_bobble's response:
BB, thank you very very much. You have lots of good advice and suggestions. I am not good at asking for help. I am too scared to be told "No" and then end up devastated from it. I am also really stubborn so things like giving my baby a bottle are out of the question even if husband were to beg to do it (plus I detest pumping). I also don't want anyone over if my house is a mess and obviously I'm not well enough to clean it.

I'm really sorry you are hurting so much too. I know shingles have got to be just awful. I definitely hope you are better soon! And feeling better emotionally soon too. Hang in there. I'm so sorry I haven't been there for you lately and yet you always reach out to help me.
 
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friedeggs replied to off_the_wall's response:
you are a good mom, you know what needs to be done, maybe for the time being you can get a home health aide to come in and help until you are feeling better, a c section is a major operation.
Healthy relationship ingredients: Love without fear. Trust without wondering. Be there without restrictions. Accept someone without wanting to change them...
 
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Caprice_WebMD_Staff replied to off_the_wall's response:
((((hugs)))) It IS hard having a baby, especially via c-section, especially when an infection is involved.

As suggested, let your husband do everything except what he can't do in the moment during the day with your kids.

I sure hope the doctors can help you heal better than you are right now.

AND I really hope you can start getting some sleep in between the feedings. Whenever they're both sleeping, you sleep yourself. That will help with the crying too.
You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.
~Christopher Robin to Pooh
 
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bubbles_bobble replied to Caprice_WebMD_Staff's response:
otw
sometimes we have to only be for ourselves so no worries on my end ok. you take care of YOU! #1 and dear can you try to stop being so stubborn! is it helping you? i don't think so.

but if thats how you want it so be it.
One day at a time


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