I'm proud of you kiddo! You took a giant leap and so far so good! Yes has it been really really really really really uncomfortable hell yah. Have you had dithers about doing things differnetly hell yah.
The thing is that we have to learn to have some empathy for ourselves. You're doing all the right things! I think. You've realized that going to far to fast is what had you in the hospital and so You are regrouping and chilling. There is nothing wrong with that.
I know that I've been really crazed about this new dx of mine and along with that felt like well isn't this a great fine howdie doo! I'm never going to get well i think. What i'm starting to understand is that our mental illness our selfs have to be managed. Most people don't try to be better they just exist. Us who are here on this board strive to be better .... With that b eing said and I don't necessarily like this answer but I beleive it is accurate. : it will take what it takes. No more no Less. It is what it is and the sooner we learn to "accept" that we are on a journey and along the journey are hills and valleys. Ups and downs to those hills and valleys naturally right? well that is how life is is just like mother nature. Unpredictable.
I know for me that i'm learning to accept myself with all my idiocnycracies. Not easy and btw you're not whining! Youre mearely stating how you feel and that is not whining!
You build the job, the boyfriend, and social life one piece at a time.
I get it. I understand. I'm sorry if you weren't looking for a long answer but i just felt compelled to wrap you with a warm cozzie and snuggle up to the fire wit ya! We're all going to be ok because we have to. Lots of times we're not ok and that's ok too.
What about all the times we are ok? Those have to count more than the times we are not ok. I think anyway that is how if you put positive meagerings in your head you will win th ebattle.
I know for me when I say I'll never do this or i'll never do that... meaning i can't. then i usually can't. I'm trying to change that and say I will I can and I'm going to! The hell with mediocrity! We can and we SHALL!
AMEN
I know i complain here a lot and get scared here a lot. It is my sounding board to the people i hold dear to me who understand me! But i also know i'm getting better at feeling better. It's really hard cuz just yesterday and the day before i had to fight so hard not to do the deed. You and everyone here has done that same thing...>>>>>So rock on sister! You deserve to take a break and not go out into the world to keep yourself safe and continue on a healthy journey!