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    It's been suggested that we leave a space between the start of a post and the triggering part.

    Write something innocuous in the first line. then leave some spaces between in and the subject matter. this should take care of accidentally triggering someone.

    How and Why to Report a Post
    *******May Trigger********* Is this common?
    mandybutterflykiss posted:
    So... I have been doing fairly well during the past 5 months... Doing the work, the stepps, DBT/CBT and I have only SH'd a few times.

    Therapy has become more intense as I am learning to "feel" emotion and not disassociate as much. I find it difficult to delve deeper into my history of trauma and discuss it. My T will bring up topics and I find myself wanting to escape, shut down... I have a difficult time even, making eye contact with her unless it is something that I feel safe in discussing.

    My T states that I need to learn acceptance... How does one accept the losses, the damages of the past... especially if the trauma's left them with physical disabilities that they must struggle with each and every day knowing their physical health will only continue to decline, The quality of life impacted severely? I am finding it difficult to move beyond this. It is not a matter of not wanting to move beyond, it is a matter of, I do not know how.

    On top of all of this I'm struggling with more health issues, more physical shortfalls of my body.

    The urge to SH is great. The thoughts I have are again returning to those dark places of where I was at just 5 months ago. I feel I will not be able to handle this all... that I'll give in and give up. That as soon as things seem to look better, reality slaps me in the face and I spiral back into the dark. Is this a common reaction in our struggle to heal the psychological, emotional wounds?

    Anyhow, thanks for listening to my rant...



    Life is the school, Love is the lesson.
    katenewbie responded:
    Hi Bonnie -

    I'd say it's common with me at least. Whenever things start getting better, BAM, I'm slapped back down again, either by events or by my crazy head.

    Have you been trying to learn & use "Radical Acceptance"? That's the DBT term for accepting life on life's terms. In other words, things are as they are, we can't go back & change them, just accept it & make the best of your situation. Accepting it, doesn't mean you approve of it, or think it was okay, it just means you accept it happened & there is nothing you can/should do about it now. Just try to move forward.

    I hope this helps. I'm going to post a separate post about my most recent slap to the face. HUGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    mandybutterflykiss replied to katenewbie's response:
    Thanks Kate-Te. My T would like me to try "Radical Acceptance" as you have stated. I accept that crap happened and I can't go back to change it. I do not know how to as she states: "sit on it for now" or to make the best of my situation.

    Example: Say I'm unable to breathe. My O2 sats are 94. I'm having issues with my blood and cells not being able to transport the O2 through my body. (Testing to see if it is bone marrow, CA is back, etc)... Now say because of this, the simple act of just trying to breathe takes all of my energy and just getting out of bed to go to the bathroom can take it's toll on me. Add in all of the Head Trauma's (TBI), Damage to the rest of me, hips, spine, etc so even walking is not easily done. How do I just sit with this? How does one make the best of this situation?

    I wish I knew... Hugs Darling Girl....


    Life is the school, Love is the lesson.
    slik_kitty replied to mandybutterflykiss's response:
    it isn't an easy thing to do, but when a person is faced with problems in life that are not going to go away, we can bemoan the fact that there are things we can't fix and be miserable, or we can accept that this is the way things are for now and be happier. it is just a mind set. it doesn't change reality, but changes how we look at it. personally, i'd rather accept and be as happy as i can instead of crying over the bad things in life. it was a hard road for me to get to, but i did get there, and you can too.
    mandybutterflykiss replied to slik_kitty's response:
    Thank you SK.


    Life is the school, Love is the lesson.

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