First I wish to say that I truly do care about and love you all. So what I write next, know is not about any one person or persons here... It's about me.
I've decided that interacting with others is not beneficial for me, be it online or offline. It isn't just WebMd boards but all sites like FB, etc.
I'm finding it difficult now that I can not disassociate as well as I used to and am now feeling whatever the heck these emotions are that my T thinks I should feel. I just know that I can not handle the drama of online or offline life. So for my own wellness and sanity, I have decided that being online is not beneficial for me.
And offline, I do not know ... I have many struggles I'm dealing with. Restraining orders against perps which seems to be never ending and the results always the same. Health issues... The newest is testing for Leukemia. I just feel as if I am backsliding.
I have my partner and Therapist and Doctors and of course, MandyCake. Will this be enough for me to not give in or give up? Will they be enough for me to keep fighting? I do not know...
I just know that I need to eliminate as much drama from my life as I can and it must start with the online...
I love you all. I pray that your journeys before you will be healing. I pray that you all find peace. I will miss you and the family of butterflies we have all been.
As my therapist states: Change means finding ways to let go... So fly free butterflies...
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