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It's been suggested that we leave a space between the start of a post and the triggering part.

Write something innocuous in the first line. then leave some spaces between in and the subject matter. this should take care of accidentally triggering someone.

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Brainstorming Guidelines for Taking Back our Board.
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mandybutterflykiss posted:
I would like to begin by saying:

I think: I would like to see the past issues on the boards stay in the past. I think no good will come from picking at the wounds over and over.

I feel: I would like to use those experiences as building blocks to move forward. Example: If I neglected to follow the new guidelines by continuing to bring up sore topics, disrespected others with name calling or finger pointing, I would want everyone to ignore me and not respond to my posts as I feel this would only feed into the negative behavior I was engaging in.

I believe: My posts should be "I" statements. If reaching out to others to offer support, then I believe that only supportive comments should be given. Example: (If I may use your recent post Dem? If you were seeking advice on how to cope with the thoughts and feelings of what happened) I would respond with: When "I" felt hurt, felt triggered, felt fingers pointing and names... this is what I did to help myself heal from it.

See how my response kept it about positive feedback, healing and support by sharing what I did to help myself? I believe it is all in the wording and this is a learned behavior.

I would like to see our boards return to the healing, supportive, safe space they used to be. I believe to do this then we must remain in the present tense and utilize the "I"... I feel that if someone was to be disrespectful, rude, insulting or argumentative and not willing to follow guidelines, then they should simply be ignored. After all... if a child were acting out and hurting other children so as to get attention would I give that child who acted out the attention it was seeking thus reinforcing it's belief that if it acts out, it gets what it wants? Or would I go to the wounded children and get them first safe, then second, calm, giving my attention to them? Teaching the acting out child by example that when they behave as such, they will not get what they seek?

So folks... this is what I would like to offer up as a start to brainstorming.

Gra'
Bonnie

Gra'

Bonnie

Life is the school, Love is the lesson.
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