Mfm threesome
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An_244339 posted:
My fiancé and I were laying in bed and he brought up his fantasy about having a threesome with me him and another man, well it happened to be with someone he works with and I agreed to do it and the guy came over and one thing led to another well as I was doing things to the other guy my fiancé was trying to do things to me and the position I was laying in the things my fiancé was doing to me was hurting me so I happened to slap his hand away and told him he was hurting me, now my fiancé is feeling like he was left out on the side to watch me and another man have sex, he will tell me one day that he understands that I just got caught up in the moment and that I shouldn't apologize but the next day he starts dwelling on it again, replaying everything over in his mind and and he gets pissed off at me, and it's to the point he doesn't touch me or look at me or even make love to me like he did before all this happened, I love him dearly and I'm just kind of confused and torn about the whole situation, I wish I could go back and change everything, if I knew it would make him feel this way I would have never agreed to do such a stupid thing. I really need some advice from someone who's been through this, please help me
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Anon_16867 responded:
sounds too me it was a set up from the start...u should never have agreed to do it from the start like u said ..never would put my SO in a position like that..true i would do it with someones else wife or gf but not my own...what was he trying to do too u that u had too slap his hand away...did u and the other guy finish what u was doing while ur fiance watched..i bet it made his exter mad ..good luck with him getting over it for awhile..he is going to throw it in ur face for a long time...good luck...
 
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j5dc2 responded:
To me, doing anything to please my partner/spouse does not mean bringing another person into our relationship, girl or guy. Some fantasies are better staying as such. I hope you both learned your lesson; most likely, your relationship will never be the same again.
 
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VoyeurDom responded:
Like you and your fiance, my girlfriend and I invited another man to be her lover. I (the male) had a similar situation as you experienced. She did not hit me, but I realized that she wanted some 1 on 1 time with our lover.

At first I felt angry and confused about being "left out". But we talked about it and I felt much better about the whole thing. The other man thought he was bicurious and discovered that he felt too shy about being naked, having sex with another man in the room.

My girlfriend and I agreed that she could see him for sex from time to time. We were ok in the end. I found that voyeurism is a very powerful sexual thing in my life.

I do not think you did anything bad or wrong at all. I hope you do not judge yourself for having had a threeway. Threesomes can be incredibly erotic, but they require a LOT of communication and preparation up front... and a shared sense of where all the parties have comfort zones and NO GO zones...

I hope you and he can reconcile. Good luck. If he wants to email me, I am more than happy to give him my perspective.
 
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jgutten replied to VoyeurDom's response:
My girlfriend and I have had two MFM threesomes and it has been an exciting experience. We are going to have one or two of these per year. We found a guy who we both like, respects limits, doesn't want any relationship and is a lot of fun. The biggest challenge here is finding the right guy. My girlfriend was reluctant at first. Now, she looks forward to being the center of attention. Both of the males make her the highlight of the evening and try to bring pleasure to her. She loves it and it is exciting for all of us. It's important to understand that this is not about love. It's about having some fun with your body and getting excited. Lovemaking is what you do with someone you love. A threesome is just about sex.
 
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jaws86 responded:
If it was FMF it would be intresting? Do females this arrangement.
 
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jgutten replied to jaws86's response:
We tried a FMF threesome and it wasn't too good. With a MFM threesome, both men can give attention to the woman. While one man rests, the other can be giving her attention. In the FMF threesome, someone was always left out. When I was giving one woman my attention, my GF was sitting there. My girlfriend and I both agreed that it wasn't as much fun as a MFM. I don't think we'll do a FMF again. If the woman is bisexual, it may be a different story, but my GF is not. The MFM was very exciting for her and all of us. We were constantly working on her for hours. She was so excited that she said it was the best night of sex in her life. She was very willing to try it again.
 
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hairyd replied to VoyeurDom's response:
VD< glad your happy but this is not a MFM. This is your lady get hers and your not. No man that is enjoying sex with a female will give a dam. Who is in the room. Is this about the other male? OR about you and your lady. Will she agree to your another female time. I never seen a shy male with a full erection and a willing female.
Always remember your penis is unique, just like every man.
 
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hairyd replied to jgutten's response:
Jgutten... keep giving your woman her best sex every night. FMF and MFM work for me the same. With the FMF; each female had a break. Time to relax, pee and, refresh for me. But this was in the past. You may discuss MFMF action; if you don't need the break. but swapping can also go on for hours......
Always remember your penis is unique, just like every man.
 
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sine_cole responded:
I wouldn't worry about it. It's going to be tricky for you since you will have to strike a balanced approach: on the one hand, you have to tell him: dude, you wanted this to happen and I can't believe you're acting this way; but on the other hand, you need to also acknowledge how awkward things like this can be and how your intent was to tell him he is hurting you. Repeat that later things often and often and with all the loving you have for him. Don't forget he is hurting and he needs some assurances. some of us might think this is unfair since it's his idea in the first place, but then who of us does not have tensions between desires, fantasies, and then actual happening and how we interpret them.

Just be consistently loving and understanding: oh, sweetie, i wish i could take it all away, i can't stand seeing you in pain like this. it was not worth the trouble. you are the main person in my life. Look at me: the only reason I did that is that whatever you were doing was hurting me, period. I understand how you would think of that as dissing you, but i swear that was not on my mind in any way. I just was hurting. Please forgive me. I love you more than i can say. you are my sunshine ok, here i might be getting out on a limb, but you get my drift. just remind him how exciting the idea was and that you only did it for him and for his own fantasies.
 
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Damwright responded:
I experienced similar feelings when me and my wife first started having threesomes. What you need to understand that in many instances this is not anything you do wrong. I used to get so excited thinking about things that I just had to have a threesome. Once it was over, I felt guilty about me and another guy or two pleasing my wife. Many times I would stop the action as soon as I got mine, because the feelings of guilt would consume me because of preconceived morals that I had. After a few days however, I would start thinking about it again, and we would do it again. Eventually the feelings of guilt passed (took a couple years) and my spouse and I were truly able to enjoy the real pleasures that come with additions to the bedroom. We are still relatively young and I have no problem with 2 or 3 men banging her from one side of the bed to the other and watching how much she enjoys attending and being attended to by these men.