Skip to content
Troubled sex life
jenzi40 posted:
My boyfriend and I have a great relationship. However, our sex life is less than stellar. He is 44 and I am 40. My sex drive is higher than his. Our problems in the bedroom are not limited to him maintaining his erection. It appears that we often times have trouble "connecting" or feeling in sync with each other during sex. We have discussed our problem areas. However, neither of us seem to take a dominant role, and their is little to no foreplay.Even though i try. He says that even though i am on birth control, he is still afraid to get me pregnant and this contributes to his erection problems. We believe that this in turn causes me to feel his anxiety and become feeling disconnected. I have low body confidence even though he says i have the perfect figure for him. It is hard for me to take on a dominating roll because of this. I know for a fact, because he told me, that it is really hard for him to be the dominant one.

I love him dearly and want to work this out. So does he. Please, if anyone has any advice, i would greatly appreciate it. I realize that i need to more dominant and need more foreplay.
queston responded:
What do you think is causing the lack of sufficient foreplay for you? That's not related to an erectile issues, since his penis doesn't need to be involved. Does he understand that you need more foreplay? What's preventing it?
fcl responded:
If he is so desperately scared of getting you pregnant, would it make him feel more at ease if he wore a condom too?
There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

Helpful Tips

Difficulty having an orgasm?Expert
Try reading Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual and Personal Growth Program for Women by Julia Heiman , Joseph Ph.D. LoPiccolo and David ... More
Was this Helpful?
6 of 8 found this helpful

Related Drug Reviews

  • Drug Name User Reviews

Report Problems With Your Medications to the FDA

FDAYou are encouraged to report negative side effects of prescription drugs to the FDA. Visit the FDA MedWatch website or call 1-800-FDA-1088.

For more information, visit Dr. Becker-Phelps' website