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Marriage is great, but the sex is crap
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Anon_55213 posted:
I was dating/engaged to my wife for about 2 years prior to us getting married. During the engagement period, despite my strong pre-maritial sex stance, we had sexual encounters that included many things except intercourse. Blowjobs, the "69" a few times, and mutual masturbation. Ever since getting married, the sex has dwindled to about once a week. Even right after the wedding, we didn't have sex until the 3rd night together. To top it off, my wife is pretty much unwilling to do anything but intercourse unless I beg for a blowjob. She says she enjoys the sex when we do have it, but I get more of an impression the only reason she is having sex is because she feels it's her duty as my wife. I'm not leaving her over something as selfish as my own sexual gratification, especially when abstaining is supposed to be good for a relationship, but at the same time I just wonder if it's normal for women to not really care about sex as much as men.
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hairyd responded:
I can appreciate your pre martial sex. But it is not true that most women care less for sex than me. I agree divorce is not the answer. But a husband should not have to beg his own sexual gratification. Nor should he be limited to only once a week intercourse. Does she premit you to have 3 or 4 ejection during this session? Or 5 - 10? I can not understand how you waited for the 3rd. nite. But you can not go back. The issue as I see it your are both virgins. You both need to learn not just enjoy sex. But to make it Great. In the living room discuss these. Explain your need for three healthy meals per days. You also need sex three (/) times day. How times you can get it up!!!!!
Then your the male take control. If you want a blowjob give it 69 but if it take hours to make it super for her keep your tongue hard... If you want it missionary and you can not make it super for her get a rubber penis to finish her. Between the sex give her candy, flowers, dinner out. (it maybe McDonalds, on the lawn). Then have sex on the blanket in the moon light. Or get in the back side of the car. Or the hotel down the street.
It more than in and out of the penis. Stop and lick her vaginal; or nipples. Or let your finger work while your penis is in her mouth. You don't want the same food every day. Be rough and be gentle. She does not want your penis in the same position. But your the male show her how to enjoy sex with you. IT's the male that make the woman want MORE sex. Be the Apha Man get your gartification and awake her sexual desires.
Always remember your penis is unique, just like every man.
 
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fcl responded:
You've answered your own question:

"we had sexual encounters that included many things except intercourse"

Sex isn't just about penetration and thrusting, sex is about variety, pleasure, imagination ... Surprise her. Bring a bit of novelty to your sex life and things will (logically) get better.

Also, outside of the bedroom show her how much you love her - do little things for her and you will reap the benefits many times over.

Finally, get rid of the antiquated idea that women do not care for sex - it's not true. Yes, there are exceptions just as there are exceptions to all preconceived ideas. Some of us would have sex all day but unfortunately have to go to work some of the time
There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.


Helpful Tips

Difficulty having an orgasm?Expert
Try reading Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual and Personal Growth Program for Women by Julia Heiman , Joseph Ph.D. LoPiccolo and David ... More
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