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miaavery posted:
Hey there. I'm turning 20 soon. I've been sexually active since I was 16 and till date, I have never had an orgasm. Why is this? Four months ago I started dating this guy and I have been having sex with him ever since. He's the second person I am having a physical relationship with. I really love him and I know that I am able to please him. He does please me but the only thing I am so very frustrated about now is that I have never had an orgasm no matter how intense we get. Why??? Is there something wrong with me? I am embarrased by this. I want to enjoy the most out of sex but I feel I'm lacking in the worst way and missing out on so much. Two of my close friends say it's easy and it comes naturally. I just don't understand what they are saying. Can someone pleaseeeeee help me? Thank you so much!
elle0317 responded:
Most women do not orgasm from intercourse alone, we need foreplay and lots of it. Are you able to reach an orgasm by masturbating? Start there and, once you figure it out, show him how to do it.
stevesmw responded:
My wife had been sexually active for over 12 years and never had an orgasm. Prior to my relationship with her, I had a girlfriend who did a good job of training me. She wasn't able to orgasm from intercourse, but eventually she was.

The first time I made love to my wife to be, she orgasmed repeatedly and shortly was able to orgasm repeatedly from straight intercourse. Her previous lovers were ignorant and selfish. When her ex husband remarried, his wife trained him.

Two young, inexperienced lovers are going to have a hard time getting things to work sexually. Educate yourselves about lovemaking and hopefully your partner will be motivated to please you.
miaavery replied to stevesmw's response:
thank you very much. I will read up more in it. thanks again!
miaavery replied to elle0317's response:
Um, the thing is that I dont masturbate. Maybe I'll talk to my boyfriend about it and see how much he can help me. Thank you!
fcl replied to miaavery's response:
You need to explore your body and learn how to give yourself an orgasm. If you don't know what your body likes how can you expect your boyfriend to know? Here's a link to get you started:

Once you've learned what works for you then you can share it with your boyfriend

You might also want to read "Sex for One" by Betty Dodson.
There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.

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