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    In love with a married man that is 20 year older
    An_252805 posted:
    I got to know this married man who is 20 years older than me earlier this year.. At the beginning, I have never expected much from him. I have got no personal information of him. I do not know his name, where he actually stay, neither do I know where he actually works. I was so attracted to him and begin the intimacy relationship with him. I do it because I really like him and really enjoyed his accompany.

    However, as times goes by, I starting to want more and more from him. He began to turn cold towards me, we would go without contact for days and even not meeting up for weeks. He told me we should not continue but I am so reluctant to give up. At that every moment, I feel naive, I feel stupid. I started checking on him and begin to know his name, where he stay, where he work and how his wife looks like. I try to make myself to be the same as his wife. I started questioning myself why am I doing all this.

    I feel lost in my direction, I do not know when I can get back to my normal life. All I want was just to enjoy the every moment with him and be happy together. I knew I have to let it go and move on, but how do I take the first step. I seriously need some helpful advise.
    fcl responded:
    How on earth can you build a relationship with someone who doesn't even tell you his name??? You realize how dangerous that was?

    Look, he used you and then he threw you away. What did you expect? Now you've turned to stalking him. Stop it. Get rid of all traces of him, block his number on your phone, his email on your computer. Make an appointment with a therapist to help you work through this.

    Finally, do not get involved with any other married men. Raise your standards.
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
    dfromspencer responded:
    I agree with FCL. You need to just forget this a-hole, and move on!!! You got what most flings/affairs get, tossed out like a piece of trash! You should have done that investigation up front! After the fact, won't help you, only hurt you more to know he has a life without you!

    If you ask me, you got what you needed, a kick in the head?! I can only hope it woke you up??? Now get out there, and find someone single, and deserving of you!

    georgiagail replied to dfromspencer's response:
    We often want what we can't have. If this guy suddenly started paying you more attention and got all googly-eyed over you you'd soon realize he was just some old married fart that you no longer felt was so appealing.


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