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    Painful Intercourse still, after 2 years?
    avatar
    emobim posted:
    My girlfriend and I have been attempting to have sex for just over 2 years now. Of course, at first it was extremely painful for her and we would have to stop after 2 minutes because she just couldn't take it, but I was understanding and she wanted to work through it. Since then we have tried consistently, at least once a week, and it has not gotten any better-in fact it seems to have gotten worse, if that's possible. We've tried everything: different positions, different lubes (and lots of it), different condoms and even without. We've tired things like drinking alcohol before, using muscle relaxers, even meditation, not to mention the stereotypical date night followed by sensual massages and foreplay. She has gone to 2 different gynos, had tests done and nothing seems to be wrong yet she can't get past the 2 minute mark without almost crying in pain. Even going into the first 30 seconds she starts digging into my arms with her fingernails.

    Not to get too detailed but I'm not a pornstar, I'm at 8" when large and when we do it I can't get anything more than just the tip in, if I even let a little more in she screams in pain and pushes me out and we can't continue. It's come to the point where I don't even want pursue sexual contact because there's so much frustration an anxiety in it. This is the last possible place I can turn for help, so please help. What can we do to get different results?
    Reply
     
    avatar
    fcl responded:
    I suggest you read this. It will at least give you an idea of what you might actually be dealing with (I suspect vaginismus). What kind of tests did the docs actually do?

    http://www.mayoclinic.com/health/painful-intercourse/DS01044/DSECTION=causes
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
     
    avatar
    airius responded:
    There could be a variety of medical and physiological things going on. Endometriosis could be an issue, but that can only be found with exploritory surgery, even then, it comes back. How is her menstration period? Is it extremely painful? As far as lubes go, try regular olive oil(not extra virgin). It's inexpensive and can be found at any grocery store(suggested by gyn). Also, prior to intercourse, are you "loosening" her up with your fingers? When you lube up, are you using it on her and you? There's alot of guesswork going on here as far as what we can assume you are doing to get her ready.


    Helpful Tips

    Difficulty having an orgasm?Expert
    Try reading Becoming Orgasmic: A Sexual and Personal Growth Program for Women by Julia Heiman , Joseph Ph.D. LoPiccolo and David ... More
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