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    loss of sex drive
    An_253462 posted:
    My wife has completely lost interest in sex . Is there any pill or vitamins that will rev up her sex drive. Like a viagra for girls.
    tlkittycat1968 responded:
    We need more information. Is she going through or has she already been through menopause? Is she on any medications? Is she under a lot of stress? Is she relatively healthy? Do you have kids? If so, how old are they?
    fcl replied to tlkittycat1968's response:
    Did her sex drive suddenly disappear or was this gradual? Did it happen around the time of an important event - new baby, new job, bereavement, illness, etc? What does she say when you discuss it with her?
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
    fcl replied to fcl's response:
    There is no magic pill - if there were you'd know about it... Heck, we'd ALL know about it:)

    Also, Viagra only helps the "mechanical" side of male sexual issues, that is it can help gain an erection, it does not affect the libido...

    However, finding the root cause of her issues can help you find a solution.
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
    An_253462 replied to tlkittycat1968's response:
    40 no menopause. 3 kids 2 teen 1 eleven. Stress level should be on the low side we own house ,cars no payments and enough cash to retire. Job has some stress like any but its $10 per hour volunteer type job job just to get out of the house. She stayed at home and was busy with the kids for
    701218jon replied to fcl's response:
    very sudden. in discussion she says she is sick of it and has zero interest. Could be lingering from a 2 year affair 8-9 years ago. Not to get to graphic but we can be fooling around and she will be very wet and not allow me to do positions that end in her climax or to use my hand during intercourse to guarantee a easy climax. when we do it I have 10 minutes to finish while she watches TV if I go over ten she is mad.
    georgiagail replied to 701218jon's response:
    Who had the affair?

    dfromspencer replied to 701218jon's response:
    Ten minutes? And if you go over she is mad? Wow, what on earth could compel an otherwise healthy individual to stop liking/loving sex???

    My advice, get her to a psychiatrist, STAT!!!!!!

    Good luck!!!

    fcl replied to 701218jon's response:
    If it was a sudden onset it sounds as if there was a trigger. Take a long hard look at what happened in your lives around the time this started. Did she find out about your affair at about that time? If so, then it's time for counselling for both of you to help you get past this (because she clearly isn't managing on her own ...).
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
    An_253462 replied to georgiagail's response:
    she did.
    An_253462 replied to fcl's response:
    It was not me it was her. Not to sound like Im perfect I am was tempted and considered the "get back" affair but I'm not subjecting my kids to that crud. I am also a old school guy and took my vows and I keep my word. I have let the affair go my trust levels are low but have let it go. Funny enough after my post things picked up 3 days in a row and I though it fixed itself then did something or said something that upset her and am shut down again. Don't get the sex withholding . The marriage counseling has been tried 2 . First therapist talked to both of us individually 1 then together 1. He took my side and told her short version basically its on her and gave her somethings to work on. She was mad a her and refused to go back. She picked the next one and meet with her once alone then invited me to the second session for what I thought was going to be a ambush and give me a list of things I was doing wrong and It was a repeat of the first Dr and the DR again gave her things to work on and that was it. She said this is a waste of time. Divorce for me is not a option I think its unfair to put kids thru it. They have enough on there plate trying to make good decisions without the drama that always follows divorce. Again the weird thing is we get alone great 99% of the time. She claims again she is happy just hates sex. Im going Nuts.

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