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    cockburn posted:
    hi. i have never done this before but i have come to a point that i dont know what else to do. me and my other half have been together for 14yrs. we have a 12 yr old son. and for the last 12 yrs we have hardly hhad sex. not because of him but because of me. before my son we use to have sex all the time. but after my son i lost all sex drive. i thought it was because i was only eighteen and i was so scared to get pregnant again. so finally at the age of 30 i got fixed. i was so happy and thought how everything was going to change. no still no sex drive. i mean once we get going ya im into it and its great. but really i have no desire to initiate it at all. my husband thinks i dont want him any more and that is the farthest from the truth. i wish llike hell that i was like i was before my son. i just dont know what to do anymore and it is really effecting our relationship and has been for 12 yrs. any advice? i also take paxil for anxiety, ocds, and anger. if that means anything
    queston responded:
    Paxil, like all SSRI-class drugs, can reduce libido and make it more difficult to reach orgasm. How long have you been on it?
    dfromspencer responded:
    Wow, I am sorry you are having a problem like this?!

    As a man, and one who at one time took Paxil, I can say it had the exact opposite effect on me! It made me horny all the time. It must effect men and women differently?

    Has your doctor ever given you a test to see what your hormone levels were??? You may want to have that tested? Go see your primary care physician, and then your GYN., see what they can come up with? Something is very wrong, if you no longer have desire for sex???

    I sincerely hope you can find something that will work for you!!!

    stevesmw replied to dfromspencer's response:
    My wife took Prozac for a while and it made her aroused, but not in a pleasant way.
    cockburn replied to queston's response:
    I have been on it for the last five yrs. the thing is though that I was like this befor I started taking Paxil
    cockburn replied to dfromspencer's response:
    I have had my hormones and blood levels checked and they say everything is great. I just want to want sex the way I did before I had my son. Thank u for your kind words
    bigred53 responded:
    Why don't you try watching some porn or reading some erotic stories/novels - that might get you going. I think you really should try initiating occasionally. You did say that once you start being sexual with your husband you get into it and it's good. Keep trying different things. Go out on dates or to a motel. Get some toys. Go out and park and act like teenagers. Talk dirty to each other. You've got to keep trying for the sake of your marriage.

    Paxil does have some very strong sexual side effects. It didn't lessen my libido but it sure made it very difficult to climax. When I finally realized it was because of the Paxil I had a nice talk with my doctor and he switched me to Wellbutrin and things are much better. There are many medications that can effect your sexuality - high blood pressure medications and even high cholesterol medications and birth control pills to name a few.

    Good luck to you!

    nohard responded:
    Hi Cockburn, on this is listed as a side effect for paxil, decreased sex drive, impotence, or difficulty having an orgasm.
    Have you thought of giving it a break to see how you now are without the drug, but if you do try this just come of it very slowly by cutting down your dosage each week over a month.
    But it sound like you need to understand your own body a bit more, ever tried masturbating, or even getting to orgasm by your self.
    The is a site for you to try , its like all the sex questions you were afraid to ask well all the answers are there, plus Dr Betty Dodson is the guru of orgasm and the queen of masturbation, she runs life class's for both, there are vids on both you can down load for a small charge.
    But its a good site your find loads of info, on all the questions you could think of, any other problems you can think of , you can post to Betty at any time, she gives some good answers.
    I do hope this helps you.
    Good Luck

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