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An_256645 posted:
When I have sex with my boyfriend, it doesn't feel good to me. I have been faking orgasms for the past five months (we have been together for a year and a half now) but I still can't seem to feel anything aside from him inside me. It doesn't hurt, but it doesn't give me any pleasure either. I enjoy it only because it makes hime happy, but I am wondering why this would be. He does not have a small penis, size is not the issue. I can't even get myself off. He is y first sexual partner, and neither of us have STD's. The only two factors I could think of are these: 1. I have an ongoing issue with yeast infections because of some depression meds I take. 2. I was adopted at age five and have been told my birth father raped me. I'm not sure what to do about this, because I want to feel what he does.
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nohard responded:
Hi I would say your problem stems from the meds your on, depression meds give men ED, I think yours is FSAD (female sexual arousal disorder) what you could try if you think you can do it is to google natural ways out of depression, it would mean a drug free life if you can do it, then after some time, if you do it by slowly weaning your self off your drugs to do this.
But also try going to www.dodsonandross.com on here your find some real help for female masturbation and how to orgasm, if you think you still got a problem the post to Dr Betty Dodson, I'm sure she will find a way to help you, your find she answers all of her posts, your find she is a guru for female masturbation and orgasm's, if fact she takes life one orgasm at a time.
See how you get on.
Good Luck
 
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nohard responded:
Hi did some thinking and found you this, it kind of match's what I was saying about your drugs.
The link, http://www.med.nyu.edu/content?ChunkIID=21482
It could be of some help.
Good Luck
 
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bigred53 replied to nohard's response:
Hello there. Most women need a lot of foreplay in order to orgasm. I know I do. Also most women don't orgasm from penetration alone. We need direct clitoral stimulation to orgasm. I do as well.

Additionally as nowhard said the meds for depression can really make it difficult to orgasm. I know this from personal experience. It sometimes takes me over an hour to climax and I know my body very well and what it takes for me.

You really need to talk to your bf and ask him to spend more time helping you get properly aroused. He needs to use his fingers and mouth not just his penis. Both of you need to be patient. No wham bam thank you ma'am.

Listen to me and nowhard. I'm 60 years old and have a lot of experience and I believe he is about the same age. And both of us love sex!

Dodsonandross is a wonderful site. I have even learned a lot. You and your bf should read it together. Everyone can learn something new. I also believe that most men want their partners to climax. It can make the relationship between the two of you better. I also think that it is important to have fun with sex.

Keep trying and good sex.

Michelle
 
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stevesmw responded:
Faking it is a bad idea. He thinks he is getting it right and that will lead to frustration on your part long term. Given where you are at, congratulations for offering yourself. A good partner, will feel good about pleasing. Give him the opportunity to please you. Find out if you can orgasm from manual, oral or a vibrator.


My wife had been sexually abused as a child and even though she had been sexually active for more than ten years never had an orgasm. The first time we made love, I stimulated her orally and manually. She had her first orgasm. It turns out she was highly orgasmic. She was capable of multiple orgasms from straight intercourse. My penis is of average size and smaller than some of her previous partners Having a good sexual experience was all it took to turn things around. The biggest turnoff for her was UTIs.
 
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mogarmanhunter responded:
Tell him the truth plain and simple. I believe you CAN feel good but being that this is your first partner I would actually try masturbation by yourself in different ways to learn what works for you. Its almost like a sexual rythem for your own body. Nobody knows what you like like you. And once you know how to get off yourself you will know how to during sex. Im a guy but my wife had the same issue when we first got married so she tried to learn to get off by herself and what do you know she can now during intercourse easily. Dont give up on yourself either. And you got to make yourself want it too. Dont give into the mentality that you cant enjoy sex due to depression and a bad past. I know it was bad experience but dont let it keep you from enjoying God's gift which is sex.


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