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Penis goes limp during sex HELP!!!!
myfeba posted:
Basically, my penis goes limp during intercourse, but it stays hard and lasts during foreplay and while Im making out with a girl. It can stay hard for a long time, but when I put on a condom and insert then I get a weird feeling and the penis starts to go limp. Ive had many girlfriends and its the same thing with each one, but only in the first times we have sex tho. Later, I can stay hard forever even if Im drunk. How can I overcome this? I just want to feel comfortable and confident on the first 2 or 3 times. Because I dont think it will fly with this new girl. Also, if it matters, Im 25, I dont have any health issues, my size is pretty good so I dont worry about that, and Im in shape. PLEASE HELP!!
Vivid124 responded:
The fact that it only happens the first few times you're with a new partner indicates that it's a psychological thing. Probably deep down you are afraid of underperforming, or maybe you are just distracting yourself trying to make everything perfect, or just plain nervousness/butterflies. I guess one idea would be to refrain from masturbating for a couple days before you think you will have sex with her. You might climax more quickly, but from a woman's perspective this is preferable to you simply going limp (at least we can rationalize 'oh he was so turned on by me he came so fast,' but just going limp might make a woman feel like she failed to turn you on, etc). Another idea might be to have the first few sessions with her not involve intercourse, but stick to only oral and manual stimulation (to orgasm). This may not be practical depending on her tastes, but maybe you can think of a way to work it out. You could make it like a game, after the first few times not involving intercourse, she'll be begging for it, and you'll have grown more comfortable being sexual with her (and she'll at least know that everything at least in working order down there).
Cat78fish responded:
Okay hon, this most obviously is a case of performance anxiety when you are with a new girl. Since it doesn't happen after the first 2 or 3 times you are with a girl, why not just pretend you've been with her awhile? You know kind of like a "mind over matter" type of thing. It could also be your body's way of telling you not to have sex real early in your relationship so that you have time to really feel comfortable with a girl. What's wrong with having a few dates with someone before having sex? I think the more emotional connection you have with someone, the easier sex becomes. You might also consider that if a girl dumps you just because your penis went limp the first couple of times you had sex that she is very shallow and narrow-minded and you are better off without her. :smile: The woman you want to be with will be interested in you regardless of what happens in the bedroom and realizes that every session of sex is not going to be perfect. All kinds of embarrassing things can happen during sex but it's our ability to laugh at these things that gets us through it. There really is no need to feel embarrassed :smile: . Donna

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