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Sexually dominant women
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Givemesunshine posted:
Hello! Hope everyone's having a good day so far :smile: I was looking for a little advice/coaching on being the dominant one in a relationship/sex. I have ALWAYS wanted to be or have been submissive in a relationship but recently started dating a man who clearly prefers to be the submissive one. It started with little things like him calling me "the boss", or if I were to jokingly say "I'm gonna smack you!" he'd respond with "please do!", and he's always wanted me to tell him where we're going to eat or what we're going to do that day/night. Definitely something I'm trying to get used to! And surprisingly I'm not deterred by this and am starting to become intrigued by the possibilities and fun we could have! The thing is, because I've never been dominant before and have no idea where to start or what I'm doing I'm feeling insecure about it. The only things I've done so far is hold him down during sex (like twice) or tell him how he's bad and how he's going to be "punished" :sheepish: But never actually go through with these "punishments". I don't think he'd want to go as far as S&M but who knows! It's still a fairly new relationship! haha I'd wanna hold off on that anyway. *My questions are: What does a dominant woman do in the bedroom? What are some things to start with? Maybe there's even a good book out there about tapping into that dominant sexual side of a woman? Any advice would be helpful! Let me know if you need more info :smile: Thank you!
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LMIthe2nd responded:
I'm astonished that this post has been up for a day and no one has jumped in to offer advice. I'd recommend starting out by just "taking charge" in the bedroom. It doesn't have to be S&M stuff to be assertive. Tell him what you want and when. Tell him if you'd like your breasts stimulated, nipples sucked, etc. If you like cunnilingus, tell him to go down -- and not to stop until you tell him he can. When you want him inside, don't ask, demand it! Then tell him faster/slower/harder/etc. just the way you like. My guess is he'll love every minute of it. I know I would! :goofy:
 
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crazyfoot40 responded:
Givemesunshine...It sounds like it may be time for handcuffs and a whip, or at least a switch. That naughty boy needs a little dicipline. Then you might try some face sitting. Yummy! Tom
 
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Givemesunshine responded:
Thanks guys, it sounds like I need to just do it and get this ball rolling! Time for me to invest in some handcuffs :grin: I can't wait to see where this leads! Thanks again!
 
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jethro38 responded:
there is a web site you can go to that has all kinds of stories that have been posted on differnet pleasures. go to; swinglifestyle.com then click on stories. they have one about domianant women. this will give you some different ideas. any problem email me. enjoy; jethro
 
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MerryContrary responded:
I know a man who is "p***y whipped". It is very unattractive and he looks like a whimp. He has no guts to tell her to stop. She controls everything-where they go and when, money, etc. He is a big guy but I wonder when he is going to get tired of her. I would never dominate a man. However, I would suggest what I like and want. I would tell him to try something different to see if he liked it. When I see in a movie or tv a man who is tied to a bed or been dominated somehow, I think he is a foolish person. If your man is shy or kindly person, his personality could flip and your lives together could be damaged beyond repair. Think carefully before you become a dominating person.
 
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FCL responded:
I'd like to suggest that you visit the forums on www.bondage.com. They have advice for all levels and not just the hardcore BDSM people. Lots of ideas, lots of discussion :smile:
 
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FCL responded:
I suspect you haven't understood what she is asking, Merry ...
 
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chickflickcherry responded:
Dear Givemesunshine, The best advice I would offer here is . . . be confident. Dominance is not about who actually has the power, it is about who APPEARS to have the power. It is not what you say, it is how you say it (that sort of thing;) Sometimes playing dress-up (in whatever YOU feel sexy in) helps. The more comfortable with the situation you are, the more you will be able to relax and let loose. And if you feel up for it. . . practice reading some naughty language from websites or magazines. . . you'll probably be surprised by how much it turns you on as well! xoxo


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