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Is it normal for a young 25 yr healthy female not to reach an orgasm?
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sunshine098 posted:
I lost my virginity last year of September. I don't have sex on a regular bases. Each time that I did have sex, I never reach an orgasm is this normal?

My second question , is it normal for a young male to cum quickly? I had sex yesterday and the guy I was with reach an orgasm as soon as we started having sex. He said he didn't have sex since January so that's why he came so quick. As we continued to have sex he did last longer though.

Thanks
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queston responded:
Yes, that's all normal.

About 70% of women do not orgasm from intercourse alone. Most require stimulation of the clitoris, either separate form intercourse (manual or oral) or in addition to intercourse.

Do you masturbate? If not, you should. Once you learn what feels good and brings you to climax, you'll be able to communicate that to your partners.

A good rule of thumb is ladies first. You should reasonably expect of your partners that they would be willing to help you reach orgasm *before* intercourse. Then, if he doesn't last very long during intercourse, at least you already got yours. (And, as an added bonus, chances are he would last longer, because having already brought you to orgasm would take a lot of the pressure off, pressure which can lead to performance anxiety.)
 
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sunshine098 replied to queston's response:
Yes I masturbate using a vibrator on my clitoris sometimes. But I still don't reach an orgasm with that.
 
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sunshine098 replied to queston's response:
Yes, I use a vibrator sometimes on my clitoris but I still don't reach an orgasm with that.
 
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goodguy82 replied to sunshine098's response:
For a typical young healthy UNEXPERIENCE male/female not having a orgasm, or having one quick can be common. Queston knows what he is talking about once you learn what feels good (masturbation) getting off will be a easier goal to achieve. For the most part the more practice you take with masturbation and sex, the more control you will have over your orgasms. Also your state of mind is a big part of it, if your just using a vibrator on your clitoris to achieve orgasm it may not work every time. Make sure your mentality is up to par with your sexual preference, you have to know what turns you on. Over time the more experience gained the better lover you will, become for your self and your partner.
 
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sunshine098 replied to goodguy82's response:
I use a vibrator on my clitoris sometimes and I still don't orgasm. Is this normal? Could it be because I waited so long to have sex? I received rough oral sex before and my clitoris was bleeding from that. Could my Clitoris have got damage from that?
 
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sunshine098 replied to goodguy82's response:
Can using a vibrator damage your clitoris or prevent you from having an orgasm?
 
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Blake_Valentine replied to sunshine098's response:
It is unlikely that the past trauma to your clit is getting in the way of your climaxing, physically that is. BTW, what kind of idiot performs oral to the point of drawing blood?! How old was this guy? He was doing it WRONG.

I agree with what Goodguy82 is telling you. It will happen for you, but you need to find out what turns you on, relax, and practice! Fortunately this kind of practice can be fun. Use lube, check out some porn, see if that turns you on, get some toys and work up a fantasy with the hunk of your dreams. Orgasms are 90% mental & mood related.

Take Care....please report back to us.
 
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goodguy82 replied to sunshine098's response:
How long ago did you receive rough oral sex? IMO it is not because you have waited so long to have sex. I did not start having sex untill two and a half years ago at 23. I am still new to sex but I do know how much mood and connection to your partner have to do with a great orgasm. Like Queston said ladies first, but before someone else can touch your buttons you have to touch them first. Have you ever masturbated with out a vibrator? If so how long have you been doing it, and can you bring yourself to orgasm? I don't know about the vibrator being a bad thing for your clitoris, but I do know that you will not come to orgasm unless you are relaxed. Also have you ever been in love? I hope your not just having meaningless sex.
 
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sunshine098 replied to goodguy82's response:
Hi! Last year April 3&9. Yes I have masturbated without a vibrator before and it never really did anything for me. I used to do it a couple of times in 2009. Since 2010 I have used a vibrator. But I don't use the vibrator all the time. I never brought myself to an orgasm. Sometimes I feel like I am with the Vibrator. No I never been in love.
 
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goodguy82 replied to sunshine098's response:
I am positive that once you find a man who cares about your heart, you will be able let go of this block you have. Have you ever had a long relationship?
 
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sunshine098 replied to goodguy82's response:
No, I never been in a long term relationship. In the past I have been treated wrongly by guys. Could anger I have about pass events be blocking me from having an orgasm?
 
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goodguy82 replied to sunshine098's response:
So you have seen only the ulgy face of men, for that I am sorry. If you have so much anger about the past you may never get past the block. Learn from the bad and move on, first you must find someone who will value you for who you are not what you have. DO NOT RUSH INTO SEX get to know and trust him first, he will show what he is about in time.
 
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BalconyBelle replied to sunshine098's response:
If you are still angry about past events...then yes, I'd say its likely that's putting a damper on your sex life. Climax is all about losing yourself in the moment and letting go, and while it's possible for men and women to orgasm without emotional attachment to their partner...the best climaxes are often had by being in love (or at least very deep in like) and having that emotion returned by a partner you trust & with whom you share mutual respect and affection.

Orgasms really are 90% mentality & mood...trying to reach the ultimate high with someone you don't esteem frequently results with the whole experience falling flat (aka: post coital depression). I wish you the best of luck, both in finding out what turns you on, and finding a man worthy of sharing it with :)


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