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    Sex on the First Date?
    Chris_WebMD_Staff posted:

    When is it OK to have sex with a new partner?
    1st date? 2nd date?

    How do you know when it's time, when it's OK to take the relationship to the next level?
    Share with us!

    Life is too short, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
    Author Unknown
    HairyD responded:
    If the body chemistry and desire for both party is being felt. I have always taken the relationship to the level we were both comfortible. Therefore full sex on the first date. The second date may be the next day or six months. Because we lived in differant states. Chris as you stated life is to short. Enjoy the good moments.... slowly. But this advise is for adults 18 - 21 and older....
    Junior_Samples responded:
    It's ok when both feel the desire, and are comfortable with it.
    I personally have a difficult time when the arousal hit's the spot, but maybe that is because I am a man ?
    However, I would never pressure my partner into a bad situation that she may regret and despise me for.
    wonderingaboutthis responded:
    If two adults "click" on the first date, and the passion is there, absolutely nothing wrong with sex on the first date. A new couple wants to find out if they're compatible, and compatibility includes sexual compatibility.

    Society really has no business dictating rules like "no sex on the first date", this is an individual choice and freedom and providing it's "safer" sex, the liaison doesn't permanently change either person. As long as both people are feeling the passion, go for it!
    FCL responded:
    We had sex on our first date and we're still together 28 years later ...
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
    wonderingaboutthis replied to FCL's response:
    I wasn't so fortunate as FCL. My wife was a tough nut to crack 30 years ago, more like 5-6 dates. I actually didn't even try until the 3rd date. But, we had totally fallen in love with each other by then. We were very fortunate that we found ourselves sexually compatible. If we hadn't, we would have had a real dilemma on our hands.
    J5DC2 responded:
    First, I am a male, happily married for 15 plus years and 3 kids. When I was single the times when I pushed for sex the first date were times when I just wanted sex, nothing else. After that one time sex I didn't care if I didn't see her anymore. Talking to other males, this is the case with a lot of man, females beware, unless of course, this is what you wish.
    When I wanted to pursue a serious relationship I never, never pushed for sex the first date. My wife has tell me many times that one of the things she loved about me the first date is that I didn't ask for sex, even though I wanted to make love to her from the first time I met her. She tells me that she would tell her friends that I was a gentleman because I didn't ask for sex the first date. 15 years later I still want her all the time I can't ever get enough of her; I love her curves, and everything about her. We make love almost every night.
    FCL replied to wonderingaboutthis's response:
    FCL is a woman ...
    There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
    HairyD replied to J5DC2's response:
    j5d, true, but if the sex was good the first it will in be better with practice. You will be back if your a good lover. I am all for the virgin bride and groom. But to many after marriage does not give their 100 % of pleasuring the other person. Both from the male or female low sexual desire. Or the " hell no I will never do that". A couple should be willing to go slow but have a full SEX LIFE. To many want to make their own sex rules after the marriage. Damn what the other partner needs, desire and would love to give or receive from their lover>>>>>>> My wife was a virgin bride, but I did not choose her as wife, because she had never been cracked.
    wonderingaboutthis replied to FCL's response:
    Sorry FCL... My bad...but you were still more fortunate than both of us - you got the pleasure of sex on the first date, and had a head start on sexual compatibility because of it. Kudos to you for "going for it". Again, we were very, very lucky in being so compatible but not learning that we were until after we had fallen hopelessly in love....
    Leslieop45 responded:
    It's hard to anticipate when is a best time to have sex. Some people would say when it comes, it does. I've known the experience, I guess because I've been a little too strict about how far my relationships can go and impact my life. Cultures have an enormous role playing in deciding how you respond to this situation. As for me, in a position as a third or fourth Asian-American generation, having sex is still a big no-no for any kinds of date whatsoever. It's just truly a green light when two actually get married. Because of the idea of having sex as a matter of course of dating or at least long relationship, it turns out not so pretty. It's actually okay when the two truly make a life commitment and take responsibilities for the future deeds. That's when sex turns out as a result of happiness and wise love.
    cto312 responded:
    I would say 2nd or 3rd date.
    I have a friend that usually has sex on her first dates... then is surprised and heart broken when she doesn't get a second date or when she finds out the guy has a girlfriend or wife.

    On a perfect date where you both got along and were both into each other and agreed and were honest about not caring or caring as much about sex as the other person... sex on the first date would probably work.
    Jumper197074857 responded:
    My wife and I had sex on our second date. But our first date involved some very heavy petting and making out. To this day we're still surprised we didn't have sex on the first date.

    But to go along with what others have said, I think it should depend on how comfortable each other is with their partner. If things seem to click, I don't see why not sex on a first date could be ruled a bad thing
    Chris_WebMD_Staff replied to FCL's response:
    I wish we had a "like" button FCL!

    Life is too short, so kiss slowly, laugh insanely, love truly and forgive quickly.
    Author Unknown
    karmasxlilxhelper responded:
    I've known my guy for about a year now. We met online in a chatroom and became instant friends. We've gotten each other through some pretty rough times and always come to each other immediately for advice. We fell instantly in love with each other but didn't quite find out until about a month ago. We were just fooling around in a chatroom going back and forth about some topic of conversation when I decided to message him and admit that I do indeed have feelings for him that extend beyond the friendship boundaries. He admitted that he's had the same feelings for me since we first met. I stopped flirting with other guys when I learned of his interest. I've spent more time talking to him in the past month than I have with anyone else. We tried to go out a couple of times but would cancel due to money issues or because of my school or family obligations. We finally had our first date yesterday (Monday) and it was TERRIFIC! We ended up cuddling in the spoon position on the couch under the blanket and ended up in a very hot and heavy makeout/petting session. I didn't want to pressure him for sex. It has been either 17 years or since he was 17 that he has actually had a real girlfriend and I wasn't going to add any added pressure to him or change his opinion of me. We're both madly in love with each other but for right now we're going to cuddle and make out like teenagers and not worry about sex. It will happen when it's supposed to! Neither he nor I are going anywhere!

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