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Advice for my first time?
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forensicsfreak posted:
Hi, to start off I'm a 26 year old female who happens to be a virgin and as I get older the mentioning the issue gets a little more embarrassing lol. Ok now on a more serious note, is there any adivce anyone can give me for my first time? I met this great guy and he's ok with me being a virgin and all but I have no clue as to what to use for contraceptives or anything. I mean I've done my research, just don't know what's right for me. I don't know if I should get on the pill, because we are using a condom of course. I am extremely paranoid of getting pregnant! Is there anything I can buy off the counter or do I need to see my doctor about it? Any advice would really help thank you!
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zabroza86 responded:
Being it is your first time, I suggest maybe a little bit of foreplay (kissing, caressing, touching, etc) to get you in the mood and make you less nervous about it all. I'm sure you might want to just jump into things after the foreplay, but you might wanna take it the "slow" route so that it doesn't ruin your perception about sex.

Personally, I'd say condoms are a great idea. As far as other contraception goes, what are you thinking about. I personally was taking the pills, but I had a hard time remembering when to take them and when I forgot, I freaked out...so I scratched that out. Now, I have the Mirena and that "protects" you for about 5 years. I went that route because I just had a baby and didn't want to chance getting pregnant again; all has been great. Just a thought, I'm sure somebody else will give you their advice/thoughts.
 
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An_242149 responded:
I would either go to your doctor and ask to be put on birth control, I use the Nuva ring because I forget to take pills. Or I would go buy OCT spermecide. Make sure you are still using a condom though. And know that for the first month that you are on BC you need to use two types of protection, BC and condoms Good luck!
 
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Anon_125014 replied to An_242149's response:
I've also used nuva ring because I loved the convenience factor. I know myself well enough to know I'd forget to take pills everyday, or I'd forget to take them at approximately the same time. Nuva Ring also has a fairly low dose of hormones, so it's less likely to throw your body/mental state out of whack that some of the stronger pills.

It's also effective sooner than pills (I think within 10 days as opposed to a month)...but you should make sure to never have it out for 2hrs when it's not your break, or it loses it's effectiveness. That last bit proved a bit problematic for me. The nuva ring (for me at least) felt like it was slipping a little during vigorous sex...just something to keep in mind.

Oh, and my doctor told me most guys say they can't feel it. Chances are your partner will feel you, and only you, if you decide to go with it.
 
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forensicsfreak replied to zabroza86's response:
Thank you great advice!
 
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forensicsfreak replied to An_242149's response:
ohhh ok.. so in order to have relations I would have to have been taking the pill already??? Because I don't want to wait that long lol.. Anything off the counter?
 
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forensicsfreak replied to Anon_125014's response:
thank you great advice! so the nuva ring is more effective than the pill?
 
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forensicsfreak replied to zabroza86's response:
another question. let's say i dont want to wait long for the effects of the pill to kick in, is there anything off the counter i can buy?
 
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Anon_125014 replied to forensicsfreak's response:
Off the counter? Condoms. Spermicide. Possibly a diaphragm.

Nuva Ring will probably be effective after 10 days, the pill takes a month---and when used as recommended, they're equally effective at preventing pregnancy.

I can tell you're really looking forward to your first time, and I hope it's wonderful--just remember the importance of foreplay. The more turned on you are before having sex, the better sex will be.
 
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fcl responded:
Here's a link to a site that helps you choose your method of contraception according to your needs:

https://www.plannedparenthood.org/all-access/my-method-26542.htm

Scroll down the page and click on "Find my method".

And here's a table giving the effectiveness of the various methods:

http://www.plannedparenthood.org/health-topics/birth-control/birth-control-effectiveness-chart-22710.htm
There's nothing inherently dirty about sex, but if you try real hard and use your imagination you can overcome that.
 
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An_242149 responded:
If you haven't had sex yet, go to your doctor and ask to be perscribed birth control. If you start having sex before you will have to wait until your next period before taking birth control. If you decide not to go to the doctor first make sure you use condoms. Also when you go see your doctor he/she will let you know how long you should use two forms of birth control. I personally like the nuva ring because I forget to take pills daily. However after speaking with your doctor you may find that something else may work for you better. So go see your doctor, asap
 
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tlkittycat1968 replied to forensicsfreak's response:
When I started taking the pill, I was a Sunday start which meant that I started it the Sunday after my period started. My doctor said that if I was on my period when I started taking it, the pill was effective immediately. If my period was over when I started taking it, it would be effective after a week.

You can also be a first day start which means you take the first pill the first day of your period. In that case, you would be covered immediately.
 
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MrsUtterback responded:
My advice: If your still a virgin and you not married, KEEP IT!!! I didn't believe people when they told me I would wish I'd saved myself for the man I will marry, but it is so very true. And if you're already 26, marriage might not be that far off for you. I had never felt that way until I started dating my husband. It's not like "oh you're the only one I want to have sex with," it's much deeper and powerful than that. You feel so exhilerated with emotions and you want to be so close to them that your clothes, skin, muscles and bones are in the way when you hold each other. That's when all the thoughts come floating in about how it didn't feel like this with other guys and thats when it hits you that you wish you didn't have other guys to compare this moment to; It feels so good and so right and so intimate that this moment should only belong to him and with him.
I personally am not on birth control, and my husband and I have not used any form of contraception since the first few months of us being together, so I don't have much to say about wich works best. When I was a teenager I was on the depo shot and I like that because I didn't have periods anymore and it was only needed once every 3 months (vs. everyday with the pill). Other than that your gyno might be able to suggest a few options that would suit your preferences and lifestyle best.
as for the nerves, the only way I was able to overcome that obstical was getting wasted. I got so drunk that I didn't care about anything, including my virginity (obviously). Even though it wasn't the most classy way to lose it, I was glad that the most nerve wrecking part was over.
Regardless of the route you choose, I do wish you luck on the journey to a lost virginity
 
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forensicsfreak replied to Anon_125014's response:
thank you!
 
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forensicsfreak replied to MrsUtterback's response:
thank you for such great advice, well as ready as I am to lose my virginity I think you're right about timing. I do like this guy alot but I'm going to wait a little more until I get the proper protection and I know I'm 100% safe. I will consult my doctor and probably go on the pill. Thank you for your advice.


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