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marysings posted:
[TRIGGER] When I matured, my menstrual periods were more than just painful. I lost count how many times we had to go to the ER because I was throwing up with the pain. And SHE knew all the time what the cause was. SHE KNEW. Every month I begged her to take the pain away. SHE always said there was nothing that could be done. And her anger escalated on my really bad days.

And when my younger sister started her periods, SHE told me to take care of her. My sister never got sick like I did. My sister never had to go to the ER and she never missed school.

I did. I wished for death every month. The pain was unending and no heating pad in the world could calm the cramping.

WHAT AN ABSOLUTELY CRUEL PERSON I HAD FOR A MOTHER.

I'm not even buying a card for her ... she doesn't know me anyway.
I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
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melisfit responded:
Oh, Mary that's awful. I'm so sorry you suffered so much. She doesn't deserve a Mother's Day card from you. You're kids are so lucky that despite everything that happened to you, you grew up to be such a kind and loving person. I hope they show you how much they appreciate you.
 
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Caprice_WebMD_Staff responded:
Mother's Day can be a triggering time for many who have been abused.

You're right; your mother was no mother, not nurturing, not a safe place to fall.

But you are there providing it to your grandkids now. You turned it all around, Mary. And you're taking care of yourself. Get yourself some flowers this weekend. (((safehugs)))
You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.
~Christopher Robin to Pooh
 
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marysings replied to Caprice_WebMD_Staff's response:
I even called Dr.B about this new memory and cried a bit on the phone. I told him I didn't need a call back.

I have a new blouse for church this Sunday. K, my 11 yr old granddaughter, saw a pretty light pink blouse and said, "Meemaw, you HAVE to get this! It's your color!" So I did. After all, aren't most 11 year olds wise beyond their age?

It's alumni weekend and my class is an honor class: 40 years! My goodness how we have changed. The majority of the guys are balding. A lot of female classmates were letting their hair go grey/white like me. I went to the "get-together" this evening. Tomorrow there will class photos out in front of the high school and then a banquet at 6pm. It's a busy weekend for this small town.

Thank you for validating my thoughts on a mother's day card. I figured it would simply be a waste of money.

Mary
I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
 
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marysings replied to melisfit's response:
Thanks Mellie. Both of my sons love me and tell me that everytime they call home or we call them. My older son held me the other day and told me he loved me.

I am truly blessed.
I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
 
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Caprice_WebMD_Staff replied to marysings's response:
How did the banquet, etc., go?

Good for you on getting that new blouse at your granddaughter's suggestion.

I see you emerging into the sunshine, Mary.
You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.
~Christopher Robin to Pooh
 
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marysings replied to Caprice_WebMD_Staff's response:
The banquet was actually very nice. I sat with some classmates I didn't know very well and I enjoyed the conversations. I believe I heard that the headcount was 482. A nice turnout. There was actually one little lady from the class of 1932. imagine!

The blouse looked very nice on me and K noticed it when we had lunch together on Sunday. She is my sweetheart. E is 2.5 years younger and the maturity difference is amazing. When we left on Sunday we brought home E and N(boy). This house has become a barn (doors left open); this house has become a gymnasium; and this house has been noisy. It is a sweet change but I don't think I could tolerate this fulltime. I give them back to their mother tomorrow.

I tried out a little bit of sun last Thursday and the result is my arms are broken out in a rash and several blisters. 20 minutes is all it took. I'm paler as I age. rats

Yes, Caprice, I am seeing sunshine once in a while. I started the outline of my book today. I'm waiting until we return from a trip this weekend and then I'll download the software. It's going to be an Ebook ... I sure can't afford to print and distribute.

Some of the book will include information about my WebMD experiences. Do I need to get permission to mention this community? I won't use any names ... but I will probably make up names. Will that be all right?
I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
 
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DOGDANCING_TCOS replied to marysings's response:
if you making up names can I be "THE_OLIVE_QUEEN" ? Or maybe Shewhospellsverybad ?

heheheheheeehhhe
I'm not really a psychopath, I just play one on the internet.
 
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marysings replied to DOGDANCING_TCOS's response:
LOL You're a goose Paja! Yes, you can be called "The Olive Queen.

Love to the resident psychopath

Mary
I'm strong willed and I tell it like it is. I make mistakes, I'm sometimes out of control, but I love and give with all my heart. Have patience with me as I heal.
 
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Caprice_WebMD_Staff replied to marysings's response:
I'll have to run that past our legal department, Mary, and get back to you.

Sounds like a great, busy, fun, noisy, tiring weekend!
You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.
~Christopher Robin to Pooh


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